The Sin of His Love
by Kurissyma san Tybalt
Summary: Riza is missing presumed dead. In his desperation, Roy takes a sample of the blood found at the site where she was last seen as well as a hair from a clip and attempts the Ultimate Sin… but what if you try to transmute something that's still alive? ROYAI!
1. Prologue

**Note: Becky is so mean, but she just had this idea and sheI had to do it!! (Is mauled by mad Riza-fans with torches and pitchforks). Ooooh! But Becky knows what she's doing!! She has a whole plan worked out! You'll see! It even goes past the first few chapters, unlike most of her stories! She very proud so please review!! -Becky**

**The Sin of Love  
**

**Summary: First Lieutenant Elizabeth Hawkeye is missing- presumed dead. In his desperation, Roy takes a sample of the blood found at the site where she was last seen as well as a couple of strands of hair from a clip and attempts the Ultimate Sin… but what if you try to transmute something that isn't really dead?**

**Prologue**

"This is it, sir- this is the scene of the accident."

Brigadier General Roy Mustang bent down and ran his fingers through the stiff, bristly brown grass beneath him- a rather contemplative and thoughtful look on his face. He was thirty-one years old, with thick black hair and equally black eyes- famous as both a great war hero and a formidable alchemist.

The man beside him was twenty-four, with perfectly rectangular glasses and a small black and white dog at his feet. His name was Kain Fuery, and he was a Sergeant Major, substituting for Mustang's second in command, First Lieutenant Elizabeth Hawkeye, who hadn't turned up to work for past few days. Neither of them were worried- though a little confused. Elizabeth, or Riza, as she was known, had run up a total of nine hundred and sixty-two unused sick days and holidays in the twelve-or-so years she had worked for the Amestris Armed Forces- in short, she was fully entitled to talk a break. In fact, she could take several years worth of a holiday and still get paid- not that she would. This was what confused the men- Lieutenant Hawkeye never took a day off, not even when she was ill, but here she was, gone- and without even calling in first…

"Have we any idea what happened here, Sergeant Major?" asked Mustang, looking up and catching sight of the totalled car that lay just a few metres away.

"We believe it ran off the road, sir," said Fuery, point up the hill behind them, atop which lay a dangerously winding road.

Mustang winced inwardly, "that's one hell of a drop."

"Yes, sir."

"What about the people in the car?"

"None, sir."

Mustang stood, "what?"

"The car was empty, sir."

"Whoever was driving it must have lost control and bailed at the last minute," Roy inferred, shaking his head. "Has anyone called the police about it?"

"Actually, sir," said Fuery, leading him over to the vehicle in question, "if you look closely, there is blood on not only the seats, but also what remains of the windows, the roof and… well, just about everywhere else, sir. We believe that the people were still inside when the car came off the road and tumbled down here."

"Anyone who survived that drop would be in no position to get themselves out of the car before the police could arrive- why would they even try in the first place? They'd have more chance of rescue where they are."

"Sir?"

"I believe somebody on the outside took the body-"

"Bodies, sir," Fuery corrected him. "There were at least three people in the car- two in the front seats, and one or more in the back. We won't know until we can run some tests on it."

"…But why not leave the bodies as they were and make it seem like an accident…?"

"Maybe the people inside weren't dead- they could still talk…" said Fuery.

"I agree- maybe this was an attack after all. Have you done any testing on the car?"

"Excuse me, sir?"

"Has it been messed with?" Roy elaborated.

"I'll get someone on it right away, sir," said Fuery, and he turned around to speak to someone on the other end of a two-way radio.

Roy took a step closer to the car and opened the door. Though the car was badly convoluted and twisted, it wasn't hard- in fact, it seemed suspiciously as though someone had forced it open once before. As he leaned over, careful not to touch anything, the sun shone over his shoulder, causing something that had previously been in shadow to glint suddenly in the light. He reached over and picked it up.

It just was a shiny brown hair slide with a tiny pink flower in the corner. Not all that interesting, really. He turned it over, about to set it back down as he'd found it when he caught sight of something engraved on the underside of the clip. A brand? A victim's name? A lead? He rubbed it with his thumb carefully, clearing it of the dry blood that had caked it and froze as he read the familiar name. He read it again just to make sure he hadn't imagined it.

"Fuery," he said loudly, unable to take his eyes off of the clip. "Tell them I've found something more important- something that needs testing immediately."

"Sir?" Fuery put down his two-way and came to stand behind him. Roy turned around, his face paler than even his Northern ancestry could account for, holding the hair slide out to him with shaking hands. "Oh, yeah," said Fuery, not seeing exactly what had gotten him so worked up, "I guess we'd be able to find some pretty definite DNA on that too, huh? Any hair attached?"

"There's a name, Fuery," he said, turning it over slowly- half hoping that the name he'd found had disappeared in the two or three seconds that he'd looked away.

Fuery took it from him curiously, then his eyes widened and he almost dropped it again. "Eliz…?"

Roy nodded unhappily, "Elizabeth Hawkeye."


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1 

"Hey, Colonel Bastard- Fuery wanted me to give you the results of some test or other. You in there?" called the Fullmetal Alchemist, practically banging down the door in his impatience. "I don't know why the hell you want them so late at night, but Al reckoned I owed it to you or something. Do you want it or not?"

"Yes," came Roy's strained voice from inside. "Come in. The door's open."

Ed frowned, eyes narrowing a little. From the sound of his voice, he was pretty nearby- why not come to the door himself. _'Lazy Bastard'_ he thought, glaring at the door for a moment or to before opening it and walking in. "-The Hell?!" Edward stopped in his tracks, letting the door slam shut.

"What did Fuery say?" asked Roy, standing up and tossing a piece of chalk aside.

Edward choked slightly and shook his head, staring, open-mouthed, at the complicated arrays on the ground in front of him, before looking up at Roy. His shock soon faded to anger. "This is human transmutation!! Forbidden alchemy!! After all the shit you gave me and about trying to bring back our own mother!!"

"…I apologise, Fullmetal," said Roy, eyes hard but voice unstable. "I didn't know what it was like to want someone back so badly…"

"What if you create a homunculus, huh? No way am I letting you do such a dangerous transmutation!!"

"I was in love with her, Fullmetal!!"

Ed was momentarily silenced. "You idiot…" he turned back towards the door, face closed as he dropping the clip by his feet. "It tested positive. The blood was hers. If you need it for your transmutation… take it."

Roy bent down to pick it up solemnly, "thank you, Fullmetal."

"You'd better hope her soul's still on this side of the gate, Colonel Bastard."

"It can't have been more than a few days… it has to be."

"Whatever," he looked over his shoulder at Roy on the ground, "be sure to tell Lieutenant Hawkeye all about my helping you."

Roy smiled a little, "yeah- okay."

Ed left, having said just about the nicest thing he could possibly think to say to his supposedly least favourite person in the world. Roy shook his head, "thank you, Fullmetal," he said again, before turning back towards his circle.

"Forgive me, Riza. I'm about to sin for you."

-

Bring… bring… brinnnng… 

"_Mustang residence. I'm not here right now. For military matters call my Central office at 9322 1089. For personal matters leave a message here after the beep. If it's urgent and you can't get a hold of me, you can contact Riza Hawkeye at 9178 7229 or 9332 4607."_

_Beeeeeeeeep_

"_Hey, Mustang! You dead in there? Why didn't you come to work today? Ed said you probably wouldn't want to be interrupted… are you okay? Listen, man- I heard about the Lieutenant-"_

Roy forced his eyes open at the mention of the Lieutenant and stumbled over to the phone. "Havoc?" he croaked.

"_Mustang!! What's up?!"_

"Listen, Havoc… something happened. I need you to call Fullmetal's automail mechanic."

-

"Damn. You alchemists are so _stupid!_" snapped Winry as she fixed the automail onto Roy's left shoulder.

"It's business, isn't it?" said Roy monotonously.

"Yeah, I guess… but when are you going to give up trying to bring the dead back…"

"You and Riza got along well, didn't you?"

"…Yes… you loved her, huh?"

Roy looked down, but thankfully didn't have to answer as Ed bounded in the door.

"What happened? Did it work?!"

"You _knew_ he was going to go and do something like this?!" Winry cried and Ed stopped, staring at Roy with his almost-finished mechanical arm.

"You said it would work!"

"I… thought it would…"

"So? Do we have another homunculus to deal with now?!"

"…I didn't mean for it to happen."

"Like hell I care, Colonel Bastard! It's a yes or no question!"

"Yes…"

"Dammit!"

"Edward, stop yelling this instant!" Winry snapped, finishing work on Roy's arm and standing up abruptly. "Don't you remember what it was like after you tried to bring your mom back?! Don't you think he's suffering enough?! Now make peace!!"

"Damn this…" Ed muttered. "…Hey, Colonel?"

Roy nodded vaguely.

"I'm sorry you couldn't bring her back."

"Me too."

-

A memorial service was held a few days later. Riza being the only one of the victims yet identified, she was the only one who could receive that honour. After the service, Roy watched them carry the coffin over to the grave they had dug for her, beside Hughes'. It was a small source of satisfaction that Mustang knew it was empty. Sure, it meant that he couldn't really say goodbye to her properly… but it also meant that there might be evidence out there somewhere- evidence that would help them find and convict her killer.

When everyone else had gone, Roy remained, staring down at the grave. He hated the way it seemed to stare back at him… He glanced over at Hughes' gravestone. Originally, it had been a rather formal looking military grave- as Riza's still was- but a few weeks later, Sheska, Gracia and Elysia had returned with tools to change the inscription a little. It now read 'Brigadier General Maes Hughes- Father, Husband, Friend, Patriot'.

"Want this?"

Roy turned around and saw Gracia and Maria. Gracia was holding out that same tool to him now. He nodded slowly and took it in his flesh hand, kneeling down to add to the inscription, which read, 'First Lieutenant Elizabeth Hawkeye'. He added to the bottom, 'My Beautiful Riza- Roy Mustang.'

Roy nodded, stood and turned around, finding himself immediately subjected to the tight bear hug of two sobbing women. He didn't have the strength to console them. He cried too.

_**Note: I know it's short- next chapter will be longer.**_


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 

First Lieutenant Elizabeth Hawkeye buried her face in her pillows miserably. She had been patched up quite well but moving a lot still pained her. She closed her eyes and tried in vain to forget the events of the past 72 hours, but everything just continued to swim around her head- colours dissolving into each other- making every moment of consciousness hold a lifetime of confusion.

The brute force of the kidnapping, the pain and horror of the rape and the relief of finally falling to what she had prayed in vain to the Good Lord would be her death…

'_Get a grip, Riza. You're a trained military official, not some damsel in distress. You have to kick into survival mode if you want to get through this.'_

A small moan tearing itself from her dry throat, Riza forced herself into a sitting position and looked around, rubbing a sore spot at her collarbone that her attacker had been particularly vicious about biting. She wasn't being held in a cell or underground cave- nothing like you read in all of those dramatic adventure stories. She was in a small bedroom- scruffy, but not uninhabitable. Dragging herself out of bed, she tried the door, though she severely doubted that it would help any. She was right- it was locked and bolted.

The windows were barred so even if they had been open, that wasn't a possibility (A/n: I have bars on my windows- it's not really that uncommon). She sat down again, unsure of how long she could keep on her feet anyway, and scoured, with her eyes, the rest of the room for a way out; then for a makeshift weapon. Neither search came up positive. The room was stripped as bare as could be and anything that could possibly have been used as a weapon had been removed.

'_Back in basic training, all they taught us about being captured in a hopeless position was not to tell the enemy anything- to die with our secrets,' _Riza thought glumly. _'But I haven't seen head nor tail of my kidnappers- nor of that vile man who… who raped me- since I woke up here. At least if they were here I'd have something to distract me from the pain…'_

"First Lieutenant Hawkeye?"

Riza looked over towards the door where a young woman with a small tray of food was now standing. _'Don't act too soon. Don't let the enemy know what you're planning- even if you're planning nothing at all.' _"My name is Hawkeye," she agreed, trained eyes scrutinizing the woman carefully.

"My name is Arissa, I've been sent to check on you."

"By whom?"

"The people who brought you here," said Arissa and that was all. Balancing the tray on one hand, she closed and locked the door again with the other, slipping the key into the pocket of her apron.

"How long have you worked for them?"

"Two weeks, Miss First Lieutenant, ma'am," said Arissa.

"How old are you?"

"21, ma'am."

"Why are you helping them?"

"They pay me well, ma'am… but why are you asking me all these questions?"

Riza didn't reply- rather, she analysed the answers she was receiving carefully as she asked them- something she had learned, surprisingly enough, from her superior, Roy Mustang. The most harmless questions, the lesson had been, could sometimes give you the clearest answers. The woman was 21- Riza's guess would have been 18, at the most. Thus, she classed the woman as small for her age- a little less of a threat than before. The fact that she so readily answered the questions, and how little time she had spent in the service of the kidnappers, told her that Arissa was new to this- that she wouldn't have much experience in the area. Finally, her loyalty ran no deeper than a matter of coin.

"Miss Arissa, if you help me to leave this place, I can pay you more than what you are receiving now."

Arissa didn't reply for a while. "It would be dangerous for me," she said, at last. "They would come after me, then. Besides, they say that they do not mean to hurt you…"

Riza frowned, "yet they kidnapped me, raped me and drove me off a cliff in a stolen car."

Arissa bit her lip, flinching a little, and shook her head, "I'm sorry, Miss First Lieutenant."

"The military could offer you protection if you were to help me, Miss Arissa. Please… there is someone I need to get back to right away…"

Arissa sat down next to her, tight lips forming a wobbly smile, "your beau, Miss First Lieutenant?"

"No- my idiot Colonel," said Riza, smiling fondly- feeling a little better suddenly, even as he looked down at her hands and the horrific bruises that covered her wrists. "He'll be getting himself into trouble again without me."

"Is he very kind?"

"Yes, very," said Riza, and then- within a thousandth of a second- she had grabbed the woman, flipped her over and covered her mouth. "So you'll understand that I can't risk him being hurt on my watch, okay?" The young woman was clearly petrified and probably couldn't speak if she wanted to, but she reached into the pocket of the military jacket she'd been wearing on her way to work that day, and gagged her anyway, with two of the handkerchiefs she always carried- one for herself, and one spare for the colonel.

"Elizabeth Hawkeye?"

This time it wasn't Arissa who had spoken and the door was still locked and closed.

"What the-?"

Arissa took this opportunity to lash out at Riza, sending her stumbling backwards and let out a shrill, piercing scream- most likely alerting the entire building to Riza's uprising. Two large men burst into the room and restrained her. It wasn't at all hard- her mind was suddenly elsewhere, and she was already weak as it was.

Even as one of the brutes took out a length of rope to bind her hands to the bedposts, she was thinking about the face she'd just seen at her 12th storey window… Though surrounded by a mass of black hair, she was sure it had been her own.


	4. Chapter 3

**Dear Faithful Readers: First day back at school and I really should get STARTED on my homework, but I wanted to finish and post this first. Hope you like!! -Rissy**

**Chapter 3**

Riza awoke, not for the first time in the past two months, now, with a small moan. She looked down at her bare body. There was blood, but it had long since dried. He'd done it again, she decided eventually. That bastard. Nursing her aching head miserably, she gathered her clothes from their various deposits around the room. As she neared one wall, she had a vague but painful memory of being roughly shoved against it and hitting her head hard; as she picked up her panties, she was faced with an equally horrifying memory of him purposely scraping down her leg, drawing blood, as he forcefully removed them. Only half dressed, a few minutes later, Riza sat down, unable to take it anymore- just wanting to go to sleep and dream herself far, far away. '_How long can I stay here like this?' _she thought bitterly as she smoothed down her blood-caked black undershirt and ran a shaking hand over her bloody thigh. _'How long will I be able to hold up? …Feeling so dirty and wrong like this… it's worse than the pain.' _She reached down for her trousers just as the door opened.

"Elizabeth Hawkeye?"

It was the same voice from that day… the black-haired woman who had been outside the window.

'_It's you.'_

"Where's Arissa?" asked Riza pulling on her military issue pants slowly and without looking away from the woman's face… her face…

"Who?"

"The woman who usually brings me my meals," said Riza, gesturing to the empty tray on her bedside table. The girl had been of little help from day one, but over the past few weeks, Riza had found herself growing oddly attached to her.

"Oh, I don't work for your kidnappers," said the woman dismissively." Riza didn't reply and she went on, seeming quite amused. "I just have an uncanny ability to find myself in strange places."

"What do you want?" Riza's voice was strong, though her eyes were tired- _she_ was tired. As far as she could see, this woman was only keeping her from her much-needed rest… Still, she forced her eyes to stay open, and her mind to kick into overdrive.

"I am not your friend, Miss Hawkeye, but I am not the ally of your enemies either. So for the time being, I'll give you this," the woman reached into a small black pouch that hung loosely at her waist and tossed a Browning Hi-Power her way as casually as she might a handkerchief or tube of lipstick.

Riza blinked and caught it out of deft reflex. She would have liked more answers, but as the woman disappeared and she looked down at the gun in her bloodied and dirty hands, she couldn't help but think it was a blessing.

Steeling herself for the pain as she stretched out her arms and legs, Riza made the immediate decision to leave and return with backup- she was angry, yes, and damn it all if she didn't want her _immediate_ revenge… but she had to admit that she wasn't strong enough to face them alone in her condition. It was a grim judgement, but one she made and stuck to- her grandfather had told her that a million times… and she wanted the chance to see him again.

'_Courage is backing out of a battle you can't win and coming out the stronger for it. Live and learn, Riza- there's plenty of time to die later.'_

"I have to get out of here," she murmured to herself. The woman in black had left the door open and she took advantage of that now, walking down the narrow halls and committing the building to memory. She met only one obstacle on her way out…

"Miss First Lieutenant, ma'am!!"

Riza froze at the voice. "Arissa," she said, not turning around.

"How- How did you-?!"

"I'm leaving, Arissa- are you coming, or not?"

"But-?!"

Riza took out the gun slowly and she heard Arissa's breath hitch behind her. "I'm leaving, Arissa," she repeated.

"O-okay…"

Riza turned around to face her friend, a small smile gracing her scarred face, only to have a hard boot come into contact with her jaw.

"I'm sorry, Miss First Lieutenant but I've been ordered to detain you!"

Riza fell back a few steps in surprise, then shot at the ground and ran. Aching bones were nothing on freedom. Shouts came from nearby but she wasn't followed- it was broad daylight, after all- nobody wanted to be seen following a bloodied young woman in torn clothing running down a crowded street.

She collapsed a few blocks later, utterly exhausted.

'_There's plenty of time to die later.' 'Yes, Grandfather. Thank you. Thank you for that.'_

Looking around, she caught the eye of a very scared looking young girl- five or six at the eldest. "Are you a ghost?" she asked softly.

Riza shook her head, a shaky smile appearing on her face. "I'm- I'm not a ghost… Elysia."

Then everything went black and the young girl's oblivious mother dragged her daughter away.

-

"Uncle Roy!! What a happy surprise!!" little five-year-old Elysia Hughes gushed from behind her mother as Gracia opened the door.

"Mr Mustang, please come in," she said, smiling weakly and stepping aside to let him in.

"Thank you," he said grimly, coming inside.

Elysia poked her head out the door, "is that Aunty Riza in the car? Should we tell her to come in?"

"Elysia…" said Gracia softly, shaking her head.

"No," said Roy, his voice tightening a little, "that's Havoc. You remember Uncle Havoc, don't you?"

"Yes," Elysia agreed, "but Uncle Havoc doesn't play dress-ups as good as Aunty Riza… where's she? She isn't hurt too bad, is she?"

"Elysia, honey…"

Roy walked into the sitting room and sat down, pulling Elysia into his lap sadly, "Elysia-bear, you know that Riza can't come over anymore. She… she went to join your father in the sky."

"That's not true!" Elysia insisted. "She can't be dead! I only just spoke to her!"

Roy smiled sadly, not understanding, "it isn't fair, is it, kiddo… you've so many people you love leave you… so young…"

"Elysia, please go and play in your room while I talk to Mr Mustang," said Gracia gently but firmly.

Elysia slipped out of Roy's lap, "you find her, Uncle Roy- you find her and tell her to get well soon, okay?"

"I tried to find her, Elysia," said Roy grimly, pushing up his shirtsleeve to reveal an automail arm past his glove. "But I… couldn't."

Elysia stared at his arm in awe, "it's just like big brother's!!"

"He has a very good mechanic," said Roy, pulling the sleeve back down.

"Run along, Elysia- go and play with Edward," said Gracia, her voice shaking a little now.

Elysia brightened- remembering that her 'big brother' was around and skipped off. But not before telling Roy to tell her 'aunt' hello for her. Roy just continued to smile sadly.

A few moments of silence passed before Gracia spoke again, "you… you really tried to bring her back, didn't you? You really tried to bring her back from the dead…"

"I don't know what went wrong…"

Gracia gave him a sympathetic pat on the arm, shaking her head, "it wasn't meant to be, Mr Mustang. I'm so sorry… but it wasn't meant to be."

"I know," said Roy.

"And I'm sorry about Elysia… she and Riza were very close- as Riza and myself were- I don't think she wants to believe it… that she's gone."

"I'm sorry, Mrs Hughes. I know she was very important to this family as well. I only wish I could have been there to protect her… but the reason I came is to look at some old books and files Miss Sheska told me he never returned," he said, looking up. "Do you mind if I check the library?"

Gracia nodded easily, "do tell me if you need any help- I'll make you a cup of tea."

"I will. Thank you."

-

"Where did Uncle Roy go?" asked Elysia, as Fullmetal left and her mother came to tuck her in that night.

"He seems to have found something in a file your… your father has," said Gracia softly, kissing her child's pale, soft cheek. "He had to leave to investigate in the North."

"Why, Mommy?"

"He wants to find the person who took Aunty Riza away from us and have him put in prison so he can't hurt anyone more, darling- he wants to make it safe for everyone."

"How is Aunty Riza doing?"

Gracia froze, "Elysia, you know she's not coming back."

"Yes, she is- I just saw her," Elysia insisted and Gracia shook her head sadly. "I just saw her this afternoon."

"This- this afternoon?"

"When we were at the bakery this afternoon, Mommy- I _saw_ her!"

"It must have just been someone who looked similar, honey."

"No!!" Elysia cried out suddenly. "No!! You don't know because you didn't see, but _I did_!! And I asked her if she was a ghost because she was really white, but with blood, and she said that she wasn't, Mommy! She said, 'I'm not a ghost, Elysia.'"

"You… you saw…?"

"I _told you_, Mommy! But you didn't see!"

Gracia started shaking in the dark room and suddenly let out a small sob, gathering her child into her arms and holding her tight, "come on, Elysia, let's get your coat- we're going to call the police and drive down to the bakery."

"Are we going to see Aunty Riza, Mommy?"

"I… I hope so… I really hope you're right." Gracia buried her face in her child's hair, still crying softly, before murmuring to the wind, "…please be real, Riza… For his sake… Please be real."


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 

By eleven the next day, Roy Mustang was checking into an inn in the North with Havoc, who was relating the story to a pretty barmaid, and Gracia and Elysia Hughes were pleading with a desk nurse at the local hospital.

"You're sure you didn't admit anyone here last night? No one that had been injured- her name was Riza Hawkeye."

The nurse, who had been dealing with a frantic Mrs Hughes and her daughter for the past two hours, sighed in exasperation, "ma'am, would you like to calmly tell me who Miss Hawkeye is and why you think she might be injured?"

Gracia bit her lip and nodded, "well… Riza was supposed to have died two months ago- they found evidence that she had been in a devastating car-wreck, but no bodies. An orchestrated crime, we decided. She left behind no family, but many devoted friends, and a man who would have been her lover if she'd ever… ever been able to find the courage to tell him how she felt… Still, my daughter claims to have seen her just this afternoon- injured down a side street by the bakery."

"Is there anything more you can tell me about her? She was… a beautiful young woman- twenty-eight years old- with lengthy blonde hair and eyes like a particularly rich honeycomb." Her eyes glazed over a little and she subconsciously tightened her grip on her daughter's hand. "She was in the military, working under Colonel Roy Mustang-"

"Mustang?" said the nurse, straightening a little. "Why does that name sound familiar?"

"He was a hero in the Ishbal war," Gracia explained. "The Flame Alchemist- you've probably heard of him."

"No… that's not it…" then she brightened a little, "oh! Never mind- I remember. An Elizabeth Mustang was admitted to intensive care last night."

"What!"

"Rape victim, poor soul," said the nurse, half to herself. "Terrible wounds, that girl had."

"May we see her?" asked Gracia quickly.

"Excuse me?"

"Elizabeth Mustang," said Gracia. "Check if she'll see Gracia and Elysia Hughes."

"Do you know her?"

"Please- just ask."

The nurse gave her an odd look, but nodded, "please wait here a moment."

She left and Gracia glanced down at her daughter, smiling shakily.

"Mommy, what's 'rape'?"

Gracia's face darkened then, "someone… someone tried to hurt Riza badly."

"Is Aunty Riza playing a game- playing Elizabeth?"

"I think so, honey."

"But why?"

Gracia frowned a little deeper and was about to reply when the nurse returned.

"Miss Mustang says she is up to visitors, but don't stay long," she warned. "That woman is stubborn- overly so. Even laying there as she is, she still has the nerve to give me orders…"

"I'm afraid she's a military woman at heart," said Gracia, smiling inwardly.

"I see… please follow me."

-

"Goodness, Elysia, look how you've grown- two short months and you're ready to overtake me, aren't you?"

"Aunty Riza!!" The five-year-old clambered over to the bed to hug her 'aunt' excitedly.

Riza smiled at Gracia over her shoulder, "how are both of you doing?"

"Riza! What happened?!" cried Gracia, shaking her head in awe at her calm tone. "That nurse told me you'd been raped!!"

"That means someone tried to hurt you really badly," Elysia explained proudly.

Riza's cool mask faltered only for a moment, "I'm fine."

"I've called Edward- he'll be here soon."

"You don't need to make such a scene, Gracia," said Riza, her words light but her eyes and heart hung heavy with painful memories.

"Riza…"

"I've given my name here as Elizabeth Mustang. Could you please call me by that?"

"Are you… do you think you're still in danger?" asked Gracia worriedly.

"I… do not know the motives of my assailants," said Riza slowly. "I may just have been a random target… but still, it is possible that they were after me specifically and if that is the case, then yes, it is possible that I am still in danger. Now please, we mustn't upset little Elysia any further."

Gracia gave her a sort of helpless look, but nodded- interrupted again, at that moment, by the nurse, who had brought in the Fullmetal Alchemist. "Another visitor for you, Miss Mustang," she said, a little disapprovingly.

Riza nodded and said a short goodbye as Gracia and Elysia left and the door shut behind them. Upon being alone with Fullmetal, she sat up straighter and saluted, ignoring how her arm twanged with the pain of the familiar gesture. "Fullmetal, sir."

"Don't you 'sir' me! What the Hell happened, Lieutenant?!"

Riza chuckled a little, shaking her head.

"What's so funny?!"

"You sounded so much like Mustang just then."

"You've gone soft, Lieutenant."

"Nothing a couple hundred hours of target practise can't cure," said Riza, her voice it's usual monotone now that the happy little family of two had left and she didn't have to worry about upsetting anyone.

Fullmetal sat down next to her bed and Riza shifted, sitting up even straighter still so as to avoid the feeling of being looked down upon. "Lieutenant Hawkeye…"

"Yes, Edward?"

"I have to tell you something… there's a new Homunculus in Grand Central." Riza's eyes sharpened a little and she drew in a quick, harsh breath but did not comment. "There haven't been any reports of attacks yet, but Mustang says he knows he saw it just before he passed out."

"What happened to him?" asked Riza, inwardly horrified that he had been injured while she had been unable to cover him.

"He… He says… Urgh!"

"Edward?"

"It was Mustang's fault, Lieutenant Hawkeye- he created her!"

Riza's hand clenched into a tight fist, "what?!"

"He created her!" said Fullmetal, nodding fervently.

"How could he do something so reckless?!"

"He was trying to resurrect _you_, Lieutenant- when he thought that you'd been murdered!"

"Th-that idiot!! That damn idiot!!" Riza slammed her fist down on the side-table by her bed and winced in pain as her sore wrist was badly strained.

"Lieutenant, don't be mad," said Edward unexpectedly. "I mean, the guy's a bastard and a turd, but he _doesn't_ really only care about promotions like I thought. He attempted that transmutation because he cared about _you_- more than he even cared about Brigadier General Hughes –his _best friend_- when he died."

"Why the Hell did he risk so many lives because of me! It was irresponsible!! He could have seriously hurt himself!" Riza blushed inwardly as the last exclamation left her slightly bruised lips.

"…I gave him your damn clip," said Fullmetal, "-the one that he used when he tried to 'bring you back'. I knew it was stupid and reckless too but I gave it to him anyway- know why?"

"Actually, I have no idea," said Riza, glaring down at her lap now.

"It's because he told me that he was in love with you, Lieutenant- and because I know how it feels to want someone back so badly that you're willing to risk it all."

"This is… this is just one blow after another," said Riza quietly, her voice quavering a little.

"He's with Lieutenant Havoc in the North right now, following every damn possible lead he can find that might have anything to do with your supposed murder," said Fullmetal. "And while I'd love to see you shoot the damn bastard, I know he's actually being pretty noble."

"Yes… thank you."

"You're still mad, aren't you?"

Riza looked up, "I just wish that none of this had to happen."

"I hear ya… so…" Fullmetal paused for a moment, "…are you gonna explain to me how you ended up here?"

Riza closed her eyes for a moment or two, before sighing and opening them again, "yes," I said. "I'll tell you everything I know."

-

A/N: Next chapter is a flashback because I feel like it -Rissy 


	6. Chapter 5: FLASHBACK

_Note: ((sarcasm)) I am such a brilliant person. By the end of this chapter you will all totally be in love with me. -Rissy_ Chapter 5 Two Months Ago 

Riza opened her eyes slowly and rolled over quickly as she felt a gentle tongue lapping at her neck. "…Buraha," she sighed.

The small black and white pup gave her a look like "what did I do?" and she closed her eyes again, intent on going back to sleep.

"Buraha, stop it," she moaned as Hayate resumed his motions.

"Actually, Riza, the dog's right- you need to get ready for work."

Riza bolted up into a sitting position, eyes wide as she surveyed the man sitting at the end of her bed, dressed in a military uniform and bearing the insignia of a Colonel. "S-sir!" She looked down at her body quickly and was relieved to see that she was still fully clothed.

"Riza, relax- we didn't do anything, okay?" said Roy, an unreadable expression on his face as he noted her horror. "I walked you home, it started raining and you let me sleep in your guest room."

"I… I did?" Riza didn't remember it.

"Yes," said Roy, reached out to touch her hand, "now come on, or we'll be late for work."

Riza glanced over at her alarm clock- 8:30. "Sir!! This should have gone off at 5!"

Roy grinned sheepishly, "okay, so I might have fiddled with it just a little," he admitted. "Now, come on- time to get up."

"Sir, you'd better go on ahead- I'll be in as soon as I can."

"Nonsense, Riza. I can wait."

Riza glared at him, "_now_, sir, and I want to see that you've made a decent start on your paperwork by the time I get there." She whipped out a gun from beneath her pillow and clicked the safety off.

"God! Was that there last night?!" Roy yelped and fled.

His words took a couple of seconds to sink in. "S-so there was a 'last night'…" she whispered to herself, her breath hitching a little. Glancing back at her clock, she saw two empty wine glasses and a bottle beside it. "Dammit…" she dragged a hand up to her lips and found that they were slightly swollen. Her hair was also significantly mussed. "Buraha, was Roy with me last night?"'

Hayate blinked back up at her innocently and she sighed at the worthless reply she was afforded. Her head was beginning to hurt now, but she forced herself to gather her uniform from the chair in the corner of her room and go into the bathroom to start the shower. Pulling her nightgown over her head, she realised that someone had removed the holster and gun that should have been at her thigh the night before.

Crouching into a little ball she gritted her teeth against the pain in her eye and tried to piece together her slowly returning memories.

-

"_Sir, don't be stupid- I won't let you walk home in this weather. I have a guest room you can use for the night."_

_Roy took a quick glance behind him, to the street where it was almost sleeting. Shivering in the icy rain, he agreed and stepped inside. "Are you sure, Lieutenant?"_

"_As long as you get up on time tomorrow it shouldn't be a problem," said Riza, in a sort of 'doesn't bother me' manner._

"_Uhm… what time do you get up, Lieutenant?"_

"_Five, sir."_

"_Uhm… great."_

_Riza smiled at little at his less than enthusiastic reply. "Come in and sit down- I'll get us both a drink."_

"_Thank you."_

_Riza returned from the kitchen ten minutes later and set the two glasses down on her coffee table, flinching a little as thunder clapped outside._

"_Your house is immaculate, Lieutenant."_

"…_Thank you, sir." Riza stared down at the glass in her hands intently, her cheeks sporting a light blush._

"_Is something wrong?"_

"_Nothing," said Riza. "I guess I'm just not used to having people around the place."_

"_Do you mind?"_

"_No, of course not, sir."_

_They talked casually, then, and managed to go through several drinks as they did so, without seeming to realise it. It was no great amount of time before Roy made another of his frequent, but usually much more subtle, attempts to admit his love for her, and leaned over to kiss her mouth gently. A brilliant flush took over Riza's already pink cheeks as she responded rather eagerly, pressing herself a little closer against him as she leaned down to set her glass on the table, wrapping her arms around his neck._

_Time brought them into her bedroom, already relieved of both of their shirts, but, a few drinks behind her in terms of soberness, Roy couldn't bring himself to take it any further. He sat her down on the edge of the bed and looked deep into her glazed eyes, running a soft hand over her glowing cheeks. She leaned closer to kiss him again, but he held her at arms length, "Riza."_

"_Hmm…?"_

"_Riza, you've had too much to drink."_

"_I don't care," said Riza, pouting adorably and trying to hook her arms back around his neck._

_Roy took both of her wrists and placed them in her lap, shaking his head, "you have no idea how much I want to, Riza, but you'd murder me in the morning if we did anything inappropriate."_

_Arms restricted, Riza shook her shoulders a little so that her chest bounced appealingly but Roy wasn't having any of it._

"_Riza, I mean it," he said, refusing to look anywhere but her face. "I don't want you to regret this- another night, if you're sober and you still want to, I'd be over the moon, but not tonight- stop tempting me." He pulled the covers back like a father tucking his child in for bed and bade her climb in while he went back out into the living room to collect her pyjama top. On the way, he also picked up their glasses and, not knowing what to do with them, placed them on her bedside table before pulling her into a sitting position and dressing her properly. "Damn, Riza- doing the right thing sucks," he said, grinning a little as he gave her a quick kiss on the head. There was a small silence, then… "Okay, you are, by far, the most amusing drunk I have ever met," Roy chuckled as she used the millisecond he was leaned over for to pull him on top of her._

"_Come on, Roy…" she whispered in his ear erotically. "I want you."_

_Roy ran a hand up her side longingly and almost caved- at least, until he felt the gun holstered at her thigh, which forced him, miserably, to remember just what his beautiful Lieutenant would do to him if he took advantage of her… "No," he said firmly, pulling her pyjama pants down only to remove the holster he had found and set it on the floor beside them both._

_Riza pouted again. "But I love you." Roy froze and Riza smiled, seeing that she had gotten to him. "I love you," she said again, this time in a very small and sexy whisper._

_Roy shook his head with a small sigh, "I love you too, Riza," he said, giving her one last kiss on the lips before climbing off of her, "but not tonight, okay?"_

"_How come nothing I say is working?" asked Riza, sounding very cutely disappointed._

"_Because I care about you, Riza. And I don't want you to hate me over one night where I couldn't control myself."_

_A sudden wave of drowsiness washed over Riza and she agreed- defeated, "night, Roy."_

"_Goodnight, Riza."_

_He turned out the light and left._

-

Crouched where she was in the shower, Riza remembered only snatches of what had passed between him and herself the night before. She distinctly remembered kissing Roy and the disposal of her shirt, but thankfully, she also remembered him politely refusing to take it any further. Standing up, she smiled contentedly and reminded herself to apologise and to thank him later. Also, as she flicked the bottle cap open and began to apply her strawberry shampoo, she, quite decidedly, banished from her mind the only other part of the evening she could recall- his startling confession of love.

-

By the time she was ready and out of the bathroom, Riza had abandoned all hope of trying to sway her mind from the topic of her, as ever, wholly confusing relationship with Roy.

'_Why'd I have to go and be such a truthful drunk?' _she chided herself hopelessly as she held a hand to her throbbing head, _'why couldn't I have become violent or something- like my father used to? Roy knows how to handle me when I'm feeling particularly violent- he would've been fine! …Now I've gone and admitted that I'm in love with him- how am I supposed to go back to work like this?'_

When she stepped out onto the street, she was in no better a mindset- still wondering how the hell she had come to drink so much without even realising; and thinking _that_ only kept her from realising the next problem at hand- that a pockmarked, black-haired man had been tailing her for the past three blocks.

The man in question, unnoticed by Riza, flipped a pair of keys out of his pocket and walked a little ahead of her to unlock and start the engine of a large black car parked at the side of that road- a pretty normal thing to do. Riza wasn't suspicious- she wasn't even paying attention, still thinking about her plight. The first moment she was aware of his close proximity to her was that in which he latched onto her arm and tugged her around to face him. Automatically, she reached for her gun, and in the second it took her to ponder its absence, she'd been knocked out and thrown in the back seat. She didn't feel her head collide with the window, or even taste the blood that came from her lip when the impact forced her to bite down on it- she didn't even feel the bone in her shoulder that had been fractured.

No.

But she'd feel that a thousandfold when she next awoke bound and naked at the feet of that man the next day, and she'd feel it for the two months that followed, along with a whole other array of critical injuries, so painful that she'd wish he would just kill her and be done with it. She'd feel it then, but she'd still be thinking of Him.


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"…If I hadn't been so stubborn," Riza finished, her voice its usual monotone but carrying a heavy air of regret as Fullmetal looked on with a mixture of sympathy and horror –though that might have been from the fact that she was in love with the Colonel alone- written across his face, "and just let him wait and come with me to work, then none of this would have happened, and you wouldn't have a new homunculus to deal with."

"Lieutenant, don't be an idiot!"

Riza raised an eyebrow as Fullmetal clambered to his feet, to stand over her at his full height (which was not actually all that much but sufficed over Riza, who was sitting).

"Maybe it wouldn't have turned out the same, but you had no way of knowing that! The only people to blame are the sickos that hurt you! –Not even Mustang! You and the Colonel only did the best you could in the situations you were forced into- there was nothing more you _could_ do!!"

Riza smiled at his passionate outburst, "maybe you're right, Edward."

"Of course I'm right, Hawkeye," Fullmetal puffed indignantly. "I'm always right!"

Riza just smiled and paused a little before explaining to him, as she had to the Hughes, "in the case that I was a specific target of the assault, I thought it would be best to enter the hospital under a false persona- you'd probably better call me that."

"Okay, I guess," said Fullmetal, calming down a little. "What is it?"

"Elizabeth Mustang."

Edward didn't have time to choke out his surprise before they were interrupted.

"Lieutenant Hawkeye!"

Both of them turned towards the door where stood Fullmetal's little suit-of-armour brother, Alphonse.

"Lieutenant Hawkeye, what happened?!"

"Story time's over, Al- you missed it," said Fullmetal, with a quick glance at Riza. "I'll relate it to you later."

"I'm fine, Alphonse- it's not as bad as it looks," Riza assured him kindly.

"Yes, it is," said Fullmetal unhelpfully.

"But how did you get so beat up?!"

It was clearly incomprehensible to Alphonse that the strong and supposedly invincible Riza Hawkeye could possibly have been caught off guard.

"I was ill and distracted," said Riza. "I wasn't paying attention and I let myself become prey for some low-life on the streets. It was my own fault."

"We all thought you'd been killed!" said Alphonse, sounding about as close to tears as a suit of armour _could_ sound, as he flung his heavy metal arms around Riza's neck, making whimpering noises as she patted him on the back awkwardly- unable to help but think just how bad she'd have it when Major Armstrong learned that she was still alive, and confined to bed, no less! There'd be no escaping him…

"I assure you, I'm just fine, Alphonse."

"Colonel Mustang will be over the moon when he hears!"

"Edward, you said he was in the North, didn't you?"

Fullmetal nodded, "yeah- he said he'd found something about a murderer in Hughes' research."

"Okay. Can you call the train station and find out when the next train is?" she asked, standing and smoothing her hair down a little.

"You can't be serious, Lieutenant!" Al exclaimed.

"No way!" Ed agreed. "Mustang'd kill us if we let you leave the hospital!!"

"I don't see why- he doesn't even known I'm here," said Riza coolly, easily standing taller than Fullmetal and staring him down… Unfortunately, she wasn't quite as tall as Al. "Alphonse, please step away from the door," she sighed.

"No way, Lieutenant! Your injured! –Besides! Those men may still be out there!!"

"I'll be on the look out," said Riza determinedly, "now I know to be aware of someone who might be after me, right? Besides, it's just a train to the North, I'll be fine, and when I get there, I'll find Roy- the Colonel."

"No way you're going alone!!"

"Are you volunteering to accompany me?" asked Riza, raising an eyebrow at her favourite little shrimp.

"Grr… I guess… but Winry will have to come too or I'll miss her birthday and she hates that."

"Fine- bring your girlfriend. Now please, Alphonse. Step away from the door-"

"SHE IS JUST MY MECHANIC!!"

Riza stepped behind Al as Fullmetal exploded into several pieces even smaller than he already was, before turning to the suit of armour. "Forgive me if I seem rude, but would you mind if I hide in your armour to get past the nurses."

Alphonse suddenly looked very sheepish, "Uhm… Well… There might be a tiny problem with that…"

"Not more cats, Alphonse?" asked Riza exasperatedly.

"N-no! Not cats!!" said Al quickly as Ed shot a particularly menacing glare at him. "Just… Well… See for yourself." He plucked off his head and another one poked out.

"Hey, Blondie!! This here's _my_ hidey-hole!"

-

"I stuffed up, didn't I, Havoc?"

"Honestly, Chief? Yeah."

Roy banged his head against the table, causing a few stares from around the inn to be directed towards him.

"Damn! Don't go loco on me now, Chief!"

"But I was with her that morning- if only I'd waited for her… _dammit_!"

"You saw her?"

"I was at her house the night before," said Roy, pausing to glare as Havoc's eyes grew wide. "Nothing happened, idiot. She just didn't want me to have to walk home in the rain… but damn, if I knew she was gonna leave me the next day I definitely would've…"

"Fucked her brains out?" Havoc supplied knowingly, earning another glare from the 'Chief'.

"No!" Roy snapped (Well, not literally 'snapped' because we all know what happens when he does that…). "I would have told her that I loved her!!" _'…When she was sober, at least…'_

Havoc ducked his had shamefully.

"I'm going to go and get another drink," he muttered, but Havoc caught his arm as he stood.

"Do you really think that's a good idea, Chief?"

"Sure helped you deal with Solaris," said Roy, a little bitterly.

"But this is Riza- abstemious unto death, right?" _'Wrong.' _"She wouldn't want you to go drinking yourself off your head for her- she'd turn in her grave, she would!"

"Her grave's empty," said Roy grimly, sitting back down.

"That doesn't change and thing and you know it," said Havoc firmly.

"Yeah…"

"So… you were in love with her, huh?"

"I _am_ in love with her- will _always_ be in love with her."

"Come on, man- there'll be other girls," said Havoc hopefully.

"You're right," said Roy. "There'll be a hundred other girls- sure there will. But they won't be her and I won't ever love them the same way."

"Damn… _now_ you decide to drop your playboy habits and you have to go after the only single woman you can't have…"

"Just my luck, isn't it?" said Roy, in ill humour. "Not that I can't try…"

"You wouldn't seriously try to bring her back again would you?!" Havoc exclaimed, gawping in horror.

"No! I'm not stupid!! …But the least I can do is find the guy who killed her. I'll do everything I can to be close to her, even now, and some day I'll join her."

"What are you saying, Chief? That you're gonna just give up on being Fuhrer and chase her memory in circles for the rest of your life- until you can be with her again? You don't even know what _happens_ to the dead-!"

"Come on, Havoc- Of course not," Roy snapped irritably, staring down at the clenched fists in his lap. "I'm still going after our dream- hers and mine. I won't let it go that easily. You know she would never have stood for that."

"No," Havoc agreed. "She'd probably end up haunting you."

The two men shared a determined look and clasped hands in that manly way that women never seem to understand.

"So you still want my help getting to the top?" he went on, after a pause.

"Yeah, Havoc- I do."

-

_**Author's Note: Okayyyy… better go start my homework now. (Readers: Oo YOU AREN'T EVEN GOING TO **__**START**__** THE NEXT CHAPTER?!?!) Bye!! -Rissy**_


	8. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"_Forgive me if I seem rude, but would you mind if I hide in your armour to get past the nurses."_

_Alphonse suddenly looked very sheepish, "Uhm… Well… There might be a tiny problem with that…"_

…

"_Hey, Blondie!! This here's my hidey-hole!"_

"Alphonse, that women is a Chimera!" Riza exclaimed, pulling out her gun in less than half a second.

"Wait, Lieutenant! I already know!!" said Alphonse hastily, as Martel made a sort of angry hissing noise.

"Al, isn't she supposed to be dead?" asked Ed suspiciously.

"You're not gonna tell anyone, are you?" Al worried and Riza shook her head, lowering her gun.

"No, we're not," she said, pointedly including Ed in her decision. "You're no idiot- we'll trust your judgement of her, Al."

Martel rested her arms and chin on Al's neck, leaning over him protectively.

"Thank you, Lieutenant," said Al, relieved.

"Ms… Martel, wasn't it?"

"Yeah," the snake chimera grunted, a little standoffishly.

"Would you mind if I shared your sanctuary to leave the hospital?"

Martel shrunk back into the armour and scooted over to the side soundlessly. Taking this as permission, Riza carefully climbed in through Al's breastplate and settled herself beside her.

"Ready?" said Al, fidgeting a little, and upon hearing an affirmative reply from the two women inside him, he and his brother made to leave the hospital.

On the way out, they managed to find themselves bumping –quite literally- into Denny Brosh and Maria Ross.

"Sorry, sirs!!" they chimed, saluting.

"Are you here to see the Lieutenant?" asked Al, fidgeting some more as the girls –who had tumbled around a little on impact with the two military officers- readjusted themselves.

"Yes," said Maria. "Have you just been?"

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A BEAN?!" Ed yelled and she flinched noticeably.

"I didn't-"

"Brother! Calm down!!" cried Al, moving quickly and tossing Riza and Martel around a little as he latched onto Fullmetal, to keep him from attacking Maria and Brosh.

"I only meant to ask if you'd already seen her!" said Maria, folding her arms across her chest defiantly, but still shrinking back a bit, as a precaution.

"Yeah, we have," said Al, still holding onto his brother.

"How is she doing? We heard she was pretty knocked up," said Brosh.

"She's fine," said Fullmetal, shaking Al off, grudgingly. "She's worried about the Colonel, though- off in the North. We told her he'd be fine with Havoc, but you know her. She'd never trust anyone else with his life."

"He's too precious to her," said Al, nodding wisely, while Riza hid in his body, blushing furiously.

"Isn't it just so romantic what he did for her?" asked Maria, a little wistfully.

"It was damn foolish," Ed muttered, but nobody paid him any attention.

"Yeah, it was," Brosh agreed with her. "Though I feel sorry for the guy- Hawkeye's alive. He created that homunculus and lost an arm for no good reason."

The conversation went on a little longer on such a note, but Riza was no longer listening. Her mind had shut down at 'lost an arm'.

Martel surveyed her thoughtfully and said, in a whisper soft enough that it wouldn't be heard, "they didn't tell you that, did they? That the Colonel'd lost his arm."

Riza shook her head speechlessly.

Martel rested a pale hand on her arm in a gesture that was probably supposed to be comforting, but only unnerved Riza, who wasn't particularly used to the physical contact. "You know, Al's friend Winry- the mecha manic mechanic- told us that he didn't even seem to care, and that his only regrets were not being about to bring you back."

"He's such an idiot…"

"…I don't think so."

Riza just shook her head.

"Really," said Martel, smirking a little. "Everyone's saying that he was in love with you. Fullmetal said that he admitted it to him- said that if he'd known what was gonna happen, he would'a told you too."

"I know that," said Riza, her whisper quavering a little. "I just can't believe he'd try to bring me back after all that's happened- without even waiting to find the evidence."

"Don't be mad at him," said Martel.

"You'd be mad too if… if someone you loved so dearly put their life on the line for you- and endangered all of Amestris with his act, no less."

"So you loved him too, huh?"

Riza nodded soundlessly, "…but it's not like we could ever act on it- the military has rules about that sort of thing."

"That sucks," said Martel. "But you know, I wouldn't be mad. I reckon I'd feel kind of honoured that someone cared about me so much- however foolish they were in showing it."

Riza didn't reply for a while, but when she did she was smiling a little, "Alphonse obviously cares about you a great deal."

Martel just shrugged, looking away slightly, "I guess. He's good to me."

"Hey! Don't bring me into this!!" Al cried out suddenly and all the people on the outside stared at him.

"Al?" said Fullmetal, looking confused.

"Uhm… sorry," said Al- he'd forgotten that his body was kind of supposed to be empty. In the silence, the sound of Riza readjusting her position in Al's armour- not as used to it as Martel- was clearly heard.

"Alphonse?" said Maria, stepping closer.

"Uhh, nothing! It's nothing! Just cats!"

Maria opened his breastplate suspiciously, despite his protests, only to have it swiftly pulled back shut from the inside before she could see who was inside.

"Alphonse?" she said, again.

"Cats!" Al insisted. "I uhm, found them this morning!"

"A cat couldn't have pulled that plate closed," said Maria, and this time, both her and Brosh tugged on the plate and it came away- Riza and Martel, who were clinging on, tumbling out with it. "Lieutenant Hawkeye!!"

"Shh!!" Riza chided them as Martel pulled her back inside and used their surprise as a chance to shut the plate.

"Run, Al!"

Al obeyed and Riza braced herself against his side as the armour began to rattle and jump around her.

"Stop running! She injured- you'll only hurt her more!" Maria called out after the brothers and Al halted reluctantly.

"Are you okay Lieutenant? Martel?" asked Al.

"Fine," said Riza, a little breathless, and Martel made a small noise in the affirmative.

Brosh and Maria caught up, Brosh looking around the hallway quickly, "let's got somewhere private," he said, as a nurse came out of a nearby room. Ed and Al knew they had no choice but to follow.

Ten minutes later, Riza let them into her home, where she could change out of the distinctive hospital gown, with a well-hidden spare key.

"You can all wait here and make yourselves at home- I shouldn't be too long," she told them, looking around her living room as though she were seeing it for the first time. Shaking her head to clear it, she left the room and went into her own.

A rush of emotions swept over her as she walked in, on the floor by her bed was her thigh holster and gun, still where Roy must have left it that night, two months ago. She assumed the holster that could have saved her that day was in the living room somewhere but decided she'd find it afterwards. Moving to her closet, she took out a white blouse that would cover the bruising and cuts down her arm and a long dark grey skirt and boots that would do the same for her legs. Also taking a towel, she went into the adjoining bathroom and undressed; stepping into the shower and letting the warm water sooth her irritated wounds and frazzled nerves. She rubbed herself over with soap vigorously but refused to look down and see the extent of her wounds. Suddenly a sharp pain struck between her legs, issuing a small whimper from her and leaving her feeling as used and dirty as she had the first time that man had broken her.

Out of an indescribable urge to cover that area again, she rushed through washing her hair and stepped out of the shower, quickly wrapping herself up in her towel and looking at herself in the mirror for the first time in two months. She looked terrible, worse than she'd thought, and she was shaking miserably.

She dressed before doing anything else and had to force herself to unbutton her blouse to tend to the underlying wounds, the same for her legs. Redoing her shirt buttons hastily, she hugged it around her, tight. She didn't know why she was acting so jittery and nervous in her own bathroom, but she couldn't help it. She was afraid.

Sighing, Riza dried her hair properly before brushing it out and moving it to hide some of the bruising, cuts and bites that covered her neck. She pulled on her tights and boots, then set about applying make-up to what little skin she'd left visible, before putting on a pair of thin white leather gloves. Content that she'd covered as much of her body as possible without wearing a veil or balaclava, and that the wounds on her face were significantly less pronounced than before, she wrapped a scarf around her neck as a finishing touch, turned off the bathroom light and the fan, and dumped her towel and the hospital gown in the hamper before going back out to her guests.

"Riza, don't be ridiculous, it's summer," Gracia chided her, standing as she entered the room.

"Gracia, what are you doing here?"

"Miss Ross called me. How could you be so foolish as to leave the hospital in your condition? Riza, they put you in Intensive Care so that you could receive _intensive care_, okay? And don't think you can cover your injuries by dressing up like a snowman, either!"

"I expect it will be cold in the North, anyway," said Riza monotonously.

"Don't you think for a moment I'm letting you go, Riza!" said Gracia sternly, "now come on- get changed, I'm bringing you back to the hospital."

She stepped forward to grasp her wrist tightly and pull her back towards her room, causing Riza to hiss in pain and pull it away.

Gracia sighed, her face softer now, "come on, Riza," she said sadly and Riza followed her back into the bedroom.

Gracia sat her down on the edge of her bed and tenderly removed her scarf and gloves, shaking her head at the horrors that were uncovered, then moved to her drawers to find something cooler to wear, as the hospital gown was already in the dirty hamper with her clothes from two months ago.

"I don't want to be uncovered that way again," said Riza stiffly and Gracia froze, tears forming in her eyes as she turned back to her friend.

"Oh, Riza…" she whispered, moving to hold her friend in a gentle embrace. "Riza… my poor brave girl."

Riza bowed her head and closed her wet eyes tight to hide her tears, "I feel so dirty…" She let out a long shuddering breath, and when she spoke again it was with great resolve. "Gracia, I have to go to the North."

Gracia pulled away from her just enough to look her in the eye miserably. She could see that Riza wasn't going to take no for an answer. "You're- You're not going alone."

"Edward, Alphonse and Martel will come with me," said Riza, her voice slowly returning to normal.

"…That's not all," said Gracia, shaking her head. "I'll come too."

"You've got Elysia to worry about-"

"She'll stay with the Rockbells," Gracia insisted. "Right now, I'm worried about you, all right? If you really have to find Roy, then I'll help you."

"I do, Gracia," Riza promised solemnly._ 'It's the only place I'll feel safe.'_


	9. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Roy woke up with a groan, keeping his eyes closed as he tried to think back to the night before. Had he gone against his judgement and Havoc's and gotten himself drunk? No. It wasn't a hangover he was feeling. He dragged a hand up to his forehead, taking time to note that he was lying on the ground, and felt a wet, quite sticky substance marking it. Blood- he knew from experience.

Roy opened his eyes groggily, only to see two very large, very black eyes staring back at him innocently. After getting over the shock of the woman's presence, he looked her over properly. She was kneeling by his side- rather elegant in a black halter dress, with black hair and black eyes. She was beautiful, very much so, but the thing that drew his attention most was her pale face. It was _her_- it was really her.

"…Riza?" he moaned, reaching up to touch her hair gently. Then his eyes focused properly and he began to remember all that had happened over the first couple of months. She was dead. This wasn't her- this was the monster he'd created.

Just as he was thinking that, the woman popped a small red object –a lolly?- into her mouth thoughtfully. "My name is Elizabeth Hawkeye."

"No it's not," Roy said immediately. "You're not her."

"I can be."

Roy forced himself into a sitting position, frowning deeply. "No. You're a homunculus."

"I know that word," said the woman, blinking her big black eyes. "That's what the old woman called me. Homunculus. She gave me these." She held out the small red objects –Philosopher's Stones- in her hand to show Roy, then a look of concern passed over her face. "Is your head okay?"

"It's fine," said Roy shortly. "What did this old woman say?"

"She called me Desire. She mentioned you too- your name is Roy Mustang… _She_ was in love with you- the one I'm supposed to be."

Roy's face softened involuntarily.

"I know that look," said Desire suddenly. "I remember… it was as good as me that you were in love with before- I even recall some parts… I remember you kissing me one time- we were drunk…" her voice faltered slightly. "It was as good as me," she repeated.

Hearing the memory repeated to him was like being stabbed in the stomach. He flinched noticeably and shook his head. Desire seemed disappointed, lifting a hand to run it through his fluffy black hair, "I wanted you badly."

"It wasn't you," said Roy determinedly. "Now tell me where I am- and where's Havoc?"

"The blond man?" said Desire. "He's still back where I found you, sleeping, I should think. It's not even light yet."

"Where am I?" Roy asked.

"The old woman said to take you here," said Desire, not seeming quite sure. "She said no one would bother us."

"What do you mean by that?" asked Roy, slightly unnerved as he rubbed his bare hands together for warmth and only feeling colder from the icy metal that had replaced his left.

"She said you'd want me," said Desire, pouting. "Don't you?"

Roy shook his head, "no. I only wanted her."

"But she's dead," said Desire. "And I look enough like her, don't I? …In my human form."

Roy's eyes widened as the black hair faded to grey, then morphed to blonde and the beautiful eyes took on a familiar mahogany shade. The black dress was his only reminder that this woman wasn't the love he had lost. "It doesn't matter if you look like her," he forced himself to say, still staring helplessly into her eyes. "I never wanted her for her body."

"I could act more like her too," said Desire, reaching out to touch his shoulder.

Roy shook her away harshly, "no! I don't want a replacement!!"

"But you do," Desire insisted. "That's why you performed the transmutation- to see her again. To see _me_ again." Undeterred, she leaned forward and captured his lips with hers. He didn't pull away. His eyes were open, staring at her face- at her eyes… it could easily have been Riza staring back at him. That's what he was thinking as he closed his dark eyes and kissed her back, one hand moving up to cup her face, the other falling around her neck. "Riza…" he growled softly into her eager mouth.

"Yes, Roy. I'm here," she whispered back, a little shakily, but he faltered.

"I can't," he said, pulling away. "It feels wrong."

Desire nodded and stood up, hugging herself as she turned away from him. "You called me Riza," she said. "You were trying to pretend that I was her… but I don't want to be her anymore. When you were kissing me, I felt something terrible. I felt everything that happened to her when that man took her. Her memories from that time… she was so scared…"

Roy felt his heart constrict painfully at her words, "I'm sorry, Desire… can you tell me what happened to her?"

Desire just shook her head, "Roy… can you give me a real name? Not Riza or Desire- one just for me?"

Roy looked at her oddly as she turned to face him, there was really wanting in her eyes. He recognised it immediately as the desire to be human the other homunculi had spoken of. Struggling with himself a little, he said, "the old woman who gave you the stones- her name was Dante, wasn't it?"

"I don't want to be called Dante either," said Desire quickly but Roy just shook his head.

"Wasn't it?" he said again.

"Yes, I think so," said Desire.

"…Dante isn't my friend," said Roy, "and she's not yours either- she wants all the Stones for herself so that she can become immortal. She'll use you in the worst possible way… What I'm offering you here, Desire, is a chance to step away from her while you can- before you become entangled in her web of lies and deceit. I don't know how I can make you human, but at least I'll try. I'll give you a name and you can make new memories of your own, but you have to promise me you'll never return to Dante- never speak to her again."

Desire looked confused, but she nodded without hesitation, "I promise, Roy."

"Then I promise to try and help you."

-

They'd been on a train for 4 hours. Riza, Winry, Gracia, Alphonse, Edward and Martel. Martel was out of Al's armour now, and very happy about it. She was now complaining to Riza about just how long she'd spent in there.

"Months and months- and it was like sitting in a freaking pressure cooker when we were in the desert with those military friends of his." (A/n… Anyone recognise Ed's analogy about wearing automail?)

"How long have you been travelling with the Elrics?" asked Riza, out of politeness, though her mind was elsewhere.

"A year or so," said Martel, "and usually I have to stay cooped up when we're in public. Most people don't do well when they figure I'm a Chimera."

Riza, who had spent her first 5 years at the military academy pretending to be a boy to make life easier for herself, knew the feeling. On that note, she wondered vaguely whether or not she'd be less vulnerable to sexual predators if she disguised her sex that was again, but dismissed it as futile and cowardly. Running a scarred hand over an exposed and badly bruised wrist, she didn't hear Gracia asking her if she was all right.

"Riza?" the older woman sounded very worried when she finally looked up.

"Hmm?"

"Are you all right?" Gracia asked again and Riza nodded, pulling her sleeve back down properly.

"I'm fine."

"You're not acting like yourself, Lieutenant," said Al, sounding equally worried.

"I'm fine," she said again. "Things will go back to normal when we meet up with the Colonel in the North- I'm just not used to being far away from him. I can't help but wonder what he's doing."

"Damn bastard beat me," said Ed, staring out the window. "He can take care of himself."

"You're not _still_ sour about him showing you up in front of the _entire military_ are you?" Winry teased.

Ed just continued to glare out the window.

"Winry, please don't aggravate brother, he has been _trying_ to be nice about the Colonel, really!"

Winry's face straightened a little, "that's true. Sorry, Ed. You know, Miss Riza, Ed was very nice to the Colonel when he was getting his automail fixed… well, after he'd finished yelling at him."

"Hmph," said Ed, when he felt Riza's eyes on his back, "I only did it because I know what it's like to lose someone you love, okay? When you go back to him it'll go back to being just the same as usual."

"Thank you, Edward," said Riza kindly. "And don't worry- I'll be yelling at him enough for both of us." She took out her beloved gun and mocked shooting it at poor Gracia in the seat across from her.

"I don't doubt it," said Ed, grinning a little as he turned to face the rest of the compartment.

"How long until we reach the station at the North?" asked Martel, leaning over Al to look out the window.

"Not long now, I shouldn't think," said Winry, leaning over Ed to do the same.

"What do we do when we get there?" asked Ed. "Just check every pub or prostitute house we can find?"

Riza glared at him sharply, "first we check in with military officials in the area and see if anyone can put a location on him, then we check local inns and hotels and ask around," she said, her voice firm.

"What she said!" said Winry, whacking Ed upside the head with her handy wrench.

"Oww!! Whaddya do that for?!" he complained, a vein throbbing in his head.

"For being an idiot!!"

"Hey, guys! Look, we're here!" said Al, drawing everyone's attention to the window as the pulled into the station.

_Riza breathed in deeply. This was it- she was going to find him again._


	10. Chapter 9

**DFR, Oooh… I've got a mean plot in mind. Sorry guys, no happy ending just yet. Now… it's Sunday evening and I haven't started my homework so I'd better go… (sigh) Nyt nyt! -Rissy**

**Chapter 9**

Roy Mustang looked down at his alleged cousin, Corliss and grinned contentedly. "You look great," he told the homunculus, Desire.

"We're going to meet your friend, right? The one from the inn?"

"Havoc," Roy agreed. "Please excuse him if he tries to hit on you- he's a little rough around the edges."

"Okay," said Desire, or Corliss, beaming happily.

"He should still be here," Roy mused as he opened the door to the inn, "unless that blonde barmaid kicked him out…"

"Roy," a voice to his left –one that sounded suspiciously like a very ticked Havoc- growled.

"There you are, Havoc! I'd like you to meet-"

"I can't believe it!" said Havoc, standing and striding forward angrily, "Hawkeye's not three months gone and you've already gone back to picking up blondes!! I came here because you claimed to love her and I thought that was worth it, but if you just came to- to-!!"

"HAVOC, THIS IS MY COUSIN CORLISS!" Roy yelled when it became evident that he wasn't going to stop any time soon.

Havoc –and the rest of the pub- quietened.

"Oh," he said eventually, duly embarrassed, "nice to meet you Miss…?"

Roy shot a sideways glance at Corliss, who hadn't been given a last name yet, but she didn't seem fazed.

"Miss Hawkeye," she said- the first name that came to mind.

"You're- You're a Hawkeye?" said Havoc, gawping.

"Yes."

"Roy!! YOU INCESTUOUS IDIOT! HOW COULD YOU SCREW HAWKEYE WHEN SHE'S YOUR OWN BLOOD?!"

"Oh, for God's sake, Havoc!" Roy snapped, "shut up, will you? Everyone's staring!!" he lowered his voice a little, "look, not only did I never 'screw Hawkeye' but Corliss isn't really my cousin, and she's not related to Riza either… well, not really…"

"Then will you tell me who the hell she is before I have to yell again?" Havoc fumed.

"Not here," said Roy, and he rubbed Corliss' back in a sort of fatherly way, seeing how distressed she was becoming with all the fuss being made about her.

"Roy, is Mr Havoc angry at me?"

"He's just confused," Roy assured her. "Can you take us to that place we were at last night –Havoc, don't get any ideas, nothing happened- where you said no one would come?"

"Sure, but why?" said Corliss, straightening a little.

"People might not like it if they found out what you are," said Roy softly, so that only she and Havoc could hear. "At first, anyway."

"What she is?" said Havoc. "What _is_ she?"

"Not here," said Roy again, and Corliss led them out of the inn obligingly.

-

"Roy! You're hanging around with a homunculus!"

"Mr Havoc _is_ angry at me," said Corliss glumly.

"Havoc, be quiet- you're upsetting her," said Roy in a firm tone that said 'we'll talk about this later'.

"Okay… so you're called Corliss now, huh?"

Roy grinned at his friend gratefully, "yeah, she is. When we get back to the inn, can you call Sheska in Central and ask her to create a few files for her?"

"What makes you think I've got her number?" asked Havoc, almost blushing.

Roy gave him a stern look and he grinned.

"Yeah, I have," he said.

"Good," said Roy. "I'd also like her to file a personnel report for Corliss- as my new aide."

"Your new-?"

"Yes," said Roy firmly.

Corliss just sat there in silence as the two men discussed setting up her new life. She felt a little left out, but ultimately content. They were talking about making her human, in the records at least. There had been something appealing about Dante's promises of being a _real_ human… but she'd never lifted so much as a finger to make it happen. Roy Mustang and Jean Havoc were trying to help her even then. She smiled at the thought. _'Sorry, Dante. You're one promise too late.'_

-

The Northern Military soldiers paid little attention to Riza Hawkeye and her group as they made their way through the base- apparently not having yet heard of her supposed death two months ago, but no one she asked could tell her of the Colonel's whereabouts either. In fact no one could remember seeing him at all for several months, even years.

It was luck, however, that on a daily check of the military during their third week in the North, they ran into Major Alex Louis Armstrong. The group, most of which was still asleep, had been reduced to only herself and Maria Ross at the time of the encounter, which allowed him to hug both of them at once for double the amount of time.

When they were finally released –breathless and rather blue from the bone-crushing embrace- Armstrong had tears in his eyes. "Lieutenant Hawkeye! Are you an angel?!" he cried beauteously.

"No!" Riza spluttered, rubbing her poor bruised ribs miserably. "I was never dead!"

Armstrong looked her over properly and all the pink sparkles faded, "Lieutenant Hawkeye! You're injured!!"

Riza nodded meekly, picking up the scarf that had fallen when Armstrong had hugged her and tying it securely back around her bruised neck. "Major Armstrong, have you heard from Colonel Mustang recently? We were told we could find him in the North, but no one's seen or heard from him in months, it would seem."

"Why, he's back in Grand Central, Dear Lieutenant! He stayed only a short amount of time, to my knowledge- searching for your killers, I believe- and left with a blonde woman that he introduced to a contact of mine as your own cousin- something I called General Grumman to check on in my ill-directed suspicions."

Riza, who didn't have any cousins, nodded, eyebrows furrowed slightly.

"Is something wrong, Lieutenant Hawkeye?"

"No, nothing," said Riza, shaking her head. "Thank you for your time, Major. I will be returning to Central presently."

"Lieutenant, it grieves me terribly to be the one to tell you this, but he has taken this woman as his Aide. I'm afraid that, since your apparent death, your job no longer remains for you in Central."

"I see," said Riza, her breath catching slightly.

"But that's not fair!" Maria exploded in her defence. "She was kidnapped- _raped_- she was-!!"

"Maria, that's enough," said Riza, bowing her head.

"Lieutenant Hawkeye-"

"I'm not anymore, am I?"

"You were buried a Lieutenant," said Major Armstory loyally. "… Or rather, your empty coffin was buried as a Lieutenant."

"Good Lord, I have a grave," Riza muttered to herself.

"And upon it did Colonel Mustang engrave a beautiful sentiment, Lieutenant."

"I see… Was there a service?"

"Yes, Lieutenant."

"Colonel Mustang was crying," said Maria sadly. "He didn't want anyone to see, but he was."

"What will you do now, Lieutenant?"

Riza looked down. She honestly didn't know. Her position as Roy's aide and protector- her reason for living- was gone. Really the best thing she could do was leave- start off somewhere new, wasn't it? She'd just be a third wheel in central. Roy had taken this nameless woman as his aide and Grumman –_her_ grandfather- had accepted her as his grandchild. She was even calling herself Hawkeye. It was over. She'd been replaced as easily as one might replace a broken glass or a missing bootlace- what was left for her in Central now?

"_Major Armstrong… I wonder… are you yourself in need of a First Lieutenant?"_


	11. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Colonel Roy Mustang stared across the room at his First Lieutenant and aide meekly.

"Is something wrong, sir?"

'_God, she's even mastered Riza's tone…'_

"No, nothing, Hawkeye," he said, looking away. It felt odd to call her that- sure, she had Riza Hawkeye's face and sometimes even her voice… but he had to keep reminding himself that it wasn't her- no matter how much he wanted it to be. She was dead. Dead.

The only reason he had set the records as Corliss Hawkeye was because of Riza's grandfather- a simple wave of his hand would make anyone believe that Corliss had been a First Lieutenant in the military for years, and a member of his own family, at that. He was just that sort of person, and for the people who mightn't have believed it… well, they were smart enough to keep their mouths shut.

"Good," said Corliss. "That means there's nothing to distract you from your paperwork."

Roy laughed suddenly.

"I'm glad you find it amusing, sir."

"You sound so much like her, Hawkeye."

A pained expression fluttered over Corliss' face, "I keep remembering her- the things she said to you. The way you were with each other makes me happy, I think… but then I remember something like war or killing… or what happened to her… and I feel guilty."

"You don't need to feel guilty, Hawkeye," said Roy, feeling his heart reach out to the poor girl. "What happened to Riza wasn't your fault."

Corliss twirled a strand of blonde hair, loose from her ponytail, nervously, "I suppose not," she said, looking down.

"Of course not," said Roy warmly. "It's not your fault that I couldn't protect her… that I didn't wait for her that day."

'_But, Roy, it is my fault you don't know she's alive… It's my fault that Ross and Brosh were walking down the hallway at the exact moment the Elrics passed with Riza Hawkeye and the Chimera. It's my fault that Brosh was transferred to Eastern and that everyone who knows that Riza Hawkeye is alive is out of the area,' _Corliss thought miserably.

"You're still upset," Roy observed, furrowing his eyebrows slightly, then he stood. "I know- it's almost lunch, why don't we go for a walk? It might make you feel better. It's a beautiful day."

Corliss stood too, "are you sure?"

'_At least she's not as firm as Hawkeye with her paperwork nazi ways…' _Roy found himself thinking, with a sort of bittersweet smile on his face. "Yeah, I'm sure," he said. "It'll be fine if we just take a little break."

-

Their walk took them down the main street to the park, which was filled with picnicking families and children running around. Corliss breathed out deeply- it _was_ a nice day.

"Aunty Riza, you're back!!" cried a young, excited voice, and she and Roy turned to see Elysia Hughes bolting towards them, with a slightly less agile Pinako Rockbell chasing after her.

"Actually," said Corliss, shaking her head, and detaching the child from her military issue blue skirt, "my name is Corliss Hawkeye- a cousin of your Aunt Riza."

Pinako, who often when on small trips to play chess with General Grumman when she was bored or in a bad mood, and who knew that he didn't have any other grandchildren, just chewed her pipe suspiciously with slightly narrowed eyes.

"Oh… Will Aunty Riza be back soon?"

"Elysia…" said Roy, as gently as he was able, "I know this may be hard for you to understand, but Aunt Riza has gone to be with your father now."

"Nuh-uh," said Elysia defiantly. "She's-"

"Roy, we're late," Corliss cut in sharply. "Lunch is over- we need to get back to the office immediately."

"Oh, right…" said Roy, momentarily distracted. "I guess we should go then. Good afternoon Ms Rockbell; Elysia."

'_I'm not a bad person,' _Corliss told herself firmly as she practically dragged Roy off in the direction of Central Headquarters. _'I just… The moment She steps back onto the scene I'll lose my position as Roy's aide and First Lieutenant. He'll start spending all of his time with her. Am I wrong for trying to protect what's mine? …What I **Desire**?'_

"You still look like something's bothering you, Hawkeye," said Roy worriedly.

"No, sir- I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure… what about you?"

"Excuse me?" said Roy and they walked, side by side, into the familiar building.

"You're thinking about Her again," said Corliss bleakly.

'_Have I no right to?'_ Roy thought, a little irritably, but he forced himself to remember how hard it must be for her to suddenly have to deal with Riza's scattered memories and her condition- he wondered if he wasn't paying enough attention to her. "I'm sorry," he said. "It's just that she's always been here beside me… I never thought I'd be without her."

Corliss opened the door to their office and sat down at her desk, beginning work immediately. After a few minutes of silence however, she made a decision. "She was kidnapped by a man in a large black car."

Roy looked up sharply, " you mean Riza?"

Corliss bowed her head a little, "he raped her repeatedly and had someone drive her off a cliff. The memories end there."

She knew she was making it seem as thought Riza had died, but she had no choice, the way she saw it. Roy was her only chance at being human- the only one who cared enough to help her. _'Except for Dante…' _Corliss forced that thought out of her mind. Roy had forbidden her to seek help from that woman- he had to be right about it being a bad idea, didn't he? Yes. Of course. Just as long as she could keep him away from that other girl she'd be the main priority- he could make her human like he'd promised.

Roy buried his face in his hands for a moment or two, shaking his head like he didn't believe it. "My poor Riza…" he whispered so softly that Corliss almost didn't hear it.

Another pang of guilt stabbed at Corliss' chest but she forced herself to ignore it, "yes… I'm sorry. I suppose the body's been disposed of already."

"I suppose it has," Roy agreed miserably. "Thank you for telling me this, Hawkeye. It's been hard not knowing- maybe I can finally set her memory to rest."

Corliss smiled warmly, "what are friends for, right?" _'Uhm… anything but telling each other that their true loves have been raped and murdered and to forget about them?' _Her smile faltered but did not fade.

"All the same- Thank you," said Roy and, for once, he willingly submitted himself to his work.

-

Maria Ross was first off the next train to Central and immediately running for the large Military building that marked the centre of the city. She had to find Roy- if Riza wasn't going to tell him, she would! Bursting into the familiar office, she was surprised to find it, for the most part, unoccupied. Her eyes fell upon the blonde girl who looked so much like her dear friend and supposed that this must be Mustang's new aide- the Hawkeye impersonator.

"Can I help you?" she asked, standing up.

"Is the Colonel here? It's urgent that I speak to him," said Maria breathlessly.

"He's finished with his paperwork and decided to go home for the night," said Corliss and Maria glanced up at the clock on the wall in surprise.

It was already nine o'clock.

"O-oh…" she said, deflating a little. "I guess I'll… come back tomorrow, then."

"If it's about Elizabeth Hawkeye you needn't bother," said Corliss, a little acidly. "He already knows."

"H-he does?"

"Yes," Corliss lied, "and he doesn't want her back, so you can leave now."

"Lieutenant Ross?"

Maria looked over to the door quickly, where Roy was standing with a cup of coffee in one hand and a pile of papers in the other.

"Sir! I thought you were going home!!" said Corliss quickly.

"Nope, just coffee," said Roy, grinning. "Wouldn't want to leave you with _all_ the work." He set his things down on his desk and turned to Maria. "So, Lieutenant, what brings you here?"

Maria blushed randomly but stood up a little straighter, "your aide seemed to think you already knew, but that can't be right, can it? Because I know there's no way-"

"Lieutenant, you're babbling."

"I-I am?" said Maria, looking up at him. "I'm sorry… I just wanted to tell you myself- make sure you knew…"

"Knew _what_, Lieutenant?" asked Roy, his tone bordering on impatience.

"That Riza Hawkeye is still alive, sir."


	12. Chapter 11

**Dear Faithful Readers- Good Lord, I've done it again. You will all hate me by the end of the chapter. (Ducks for cover from horrified Royai fans). And don't give me that look Erinn; Sisi. It's all necessary for my demented and twisted plot!! -Rissy**

**Chapter 11**

Major Armstrong and his subordinates didn't need babysitting like Roy did. It meant leaving faster at the end of the day for Riza, but it also meant long periods of time spent working with absolutely no comic relief whatsoever.

Sighing as she set down her pen and looked over at the clock on the wall. It was only 8am. Just then, as her eyes continued to wander around the oddly empty office, the phone at Armstrong's desk rang. Curious, she stood and went to answer it.

"_Major Armstrong?"_

Riza almost dropped the phone.

"_Major Armstrong?"_

For a moment or two, Riza considered hanging up but that would have been unprofessional. "May I ask who's calling?" asked Riza, as though she didn't know.

"_It's Colonel Mustang- wait, _Riza?!"

"This is Lieutenant Hawkeye," Riza confirmed monotonously. "But I'm afraid the Major is absent this morning- I believe he went to visit his sister at the Briggs fortress yesterday afternoon, but he should be back in ten minutes or so."

"_It doesn't matter,"_ said Roy quickly. _"I only called here because Maria told me-"_

"Of course, Maria would have…" Riza mused offhandedly.

"…_Riza, why didn't you come back home after- after it happened?"_

Riza's face hardened slightly, and though Mustang couldn't see it, he easily picked up on how tight her voice had become. "I did," she said. "I even followed you to the North when I was told that's where you'd gone. But the next I heard of you, Armstrong was saying how you'd found yourself a blonde Lieutenant who was calling herself Hawkeye. I don't know how you got my Grandfather to agree to it and I don't care… You know, sir, I understand getting a replacement when you thought I was gone- of course I do- but replacing me with some woman and practically handing her my entire identity? Pretending like I never left? I don't think anyone could understand that."

From where he was standing at the door, Major Armstrong backed away silently.

"_Riza, I never wanted to replace you like that!"_

"You could have fooled me," said Riza plainly.

"_Listen, Riza. It's hard to explain, especially since I have no idea how much you know about the situation in Central, but I didn't call her that for my own selfish reasons. I need you to come down here so I can talk to you face-to-face, okay?"_

Riza frowned slightly, "I'm afraid that's not possible, Colonel Mustang, and if that's all you called for-"

"_That's it then? I don't even get a chance to explain?"_

"I have work to do, sir. Good day."

Riza hung up the phone –despite his protests- and returned to her chair, attempting to continue with the papers in front of her for a few minutes before giving up and burying her face in her arms miserably. Armstrong took that opportunity to enter the room.

"Dear Lieutenant, what can be troubling you so?" he boomed sympathetically.

Riza bolted to her feet in horror, immediately greeting him with a clumsy salute. "Forgive me, sir! I lost myself for a moment!"

"No problem, Lieutenant Hawkeye," said Armstrong. "Tell, me- has anyone called the office in my absence?"

"N-no one of any great note, sir."

"Really?" said Armstrong, in a tone that Riza couldn't quite place. "Because Lieutenant Ross just called from Central Headquarters- she seemed convinced that Colonel Mustang was going to be calling here soon."

Riza's eyes flashed in realisation- he'd heard.

"Well, there's only one thing to do, Lieutenant. I will have to send you down there to speak to him on my behalf!"

"Why can't you just call him, sir?"

"The lines might be bugged," he replied readily; then he challenged her, a dark twinkle in his blue eyes, "Have you got a problem with that, Lieutenant?"

"No, sir, but-!"

"Good," said Armstrong, straightening a little. "You may leave immediately. I wish you a good journey, Lieutenant."

Riza saluted again, resignedly. _'Damn…' _she found herself thinking. _'Does the Colonel always have to get his way?'_

Armstrong watched her open the door with a grin. "Try to listen to his reasoning before you shoot him, won't you?"

Riza kept her face empty. "I am seeing the Colonel on your business and on your business alone, Major. You shouldn't forget that… I won't."

-

First Lieutenant Elizabeth Hawkeye entered Roy's Central office the next day with the full intention of remaining strictly professional. Her case, however, was not helped by the fact that the moment she walked through the door she found herself captured by him in a tight and passionate embrace.

"Sir," she said, shifting uncomfortably but he didn't move except to bury his face deeper into her neck and she protested no further. She was surprised, though, a few moments later, when she felt wet tears against the pale flesh of her bruised neck and she blinked- the Hawkeye equivalent to swooning or fainting in shock. "Sir?"

"Riza you look terrible," he told her eventually, drawing her out to arm's length.

"Thank you very much, sir," she replied dryly, shaking her shoulders a little- a cue for him to remove his hands.

He didn't- momentarily distracted by thinking of the last time she'd done that, and that she'd been topless at the time. "Riza… Riza, I'm-"

"Sir?" This time it wasn't Riza who spoke, but Corliss, who was sitting at Riza's old desk and trying not to look too harshly upon Riza, whose presence in the room she clearly disliked.

"Oh, of course," said Roy, looking over at her. "Riza, this is Corliss."

"Corliss Hawkeye," said Riza monotonously, plucking his hands off his shoulders herself.

"Yes," said Roy. "But I swear to you that she was never supposed to be a replacement. She's… Corliss Hawkeye is the homunculus I created- Desire."

"Homuncu…? Of course…" Without warning, she reached up and slapped him. "How could you be so foolish as to actually attempt that transmutation?!" She grabbed his left arm and pulled off the pyrotex glove that covered it, revealing the metallic hand beneath. Clenching the glove in her fist she, unbelievably, began to cry hot tears of furious hopelessness and misery.

"Don't cry," he begged her desperately and his arms came around her as he gave her a gentle kiss on the mouth, which she returned for a fraction of a second before turning her head away.

"I'm sorry. I- I came here because Major Armstrong ordered me to- He wanted to know how you were doing… Well, really I think he just wanted me to have to talk to you…"

"Wait- So you're going to leave me again?"

Riza's body shook softly as the tears continued to flow down her cut and scraped cheeks, marking vague trails down her pallid, pasty white cheeks, "you've strayed too far from the path this time, sir. That transmutation could have killed you- laid waste to everything we've worked for all these years."

"But I did it for you, Riza!"

"I know… That's why I'm leaving. I'm no good for your mission, sir- nothing but a distraction. I can't risk being the reason your noble dream comes to nothing."

A low growl escaped Roy's throat as he put a hand on her shoulder, squeezing it lightly and drawing a small whimper from Riza as he added pressure to a bruise hidden by several layers of fabric. His hand immediately dropped when he saw that he was hurting her. "Riza," he said, reaching out to her now with his gently pleading eyes, "you know I'd never have made it this far without you."

Riza crossed the room to look down at the homunculus where she sat, "I don't know much about you, Corliss, but I'm trusting you to protect the Colonel for me." She flashed him a sad look over her shoulder, wiping the tears from her ears. "I'm sorry, but I can't anymore."

The hate immediately drained from Corliss' own pale face- she could _feel_ this woman's pain- feel it as clearly as though it were her own, which –in a way- it was. "I will," she said, and she stood to wrap her arms around Riza carefully, knowing exactly where not to lean too heavily and where all the worst of her wounds were. The memories were fresh in both of their minds. "You can count on me, Riza."

"I'm glad." Riza released herself and turned fully to salute Roy, who was staring at them, speechless, his usually stoic features showcasing a cheerless blend of shock and despair. "Good luck, sir," she told him, eyes dry at last and her voice oddly level. "Our paths shan't cross again."


	13. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

"She's alive," Roy was saying to Havoc, Fuery, Breda and Falman in the mess hall five minutes later. "…How can she be here again and then just… just _leave_?"

"Maybe she feels threatened by the strength of your ardour?" said Falman, who was hardly paying attention, having been listening to Roy all morning. He shook his head.

'_She knows that I love her, but she definitely didn't seem threatened by it when we were making out in her bedroom that night, and I'm sure she was kissing me back just now in the office- at least, until she pulled away, spurting that rubbish about only coming on Armstrong's orders…'_

"That's not it," he said, when he realised the others were staring at him.

"You sure?" said Havoc. "'Cause –in simpler terms- she might be kinda freaked out that you'd fall for her- or worrying that after all your years as a bachelor you couldn't be happy with just one girl."

'_Well… the only time we really kissed seriously, she **was** drunk… was she worried? Would she have done it otherwise?'_

"Sir, you're spacing out again," said Fuery nervously.

"Sorry," said Roy gruffly.

"So, man? What do you reckon?" asked Havoc, noting his previous silence and disregard for the question.

"The night before Riza disappeared…"

"You gonna spill something dirty, Colonel?" asked Breda, grinning perversely, and Roy hit him upside the head irritably.

"For your information, nothing happened," he said, glaring at his subordinates, who were _all_ actually wearing slightly perverted expressions. "…Well, not really, anyway."

"Not really?" Havoc repeated with a grin.

"We were both a little drunk," said Roy, "her more than me."

"Lieutenant Hawkeye?!" Fuery cried, gaping.

"_Our _Lieutenant Hawkeye?!" Havoc joined.

"_Our abstemious Lieutenant Hawkeye?!_" Falman exclaimed, ruining it, because nobody knew what 'abstemious' meant.

"Yeah," said Roy, a little annoyed.

"So what happened?" asked Havoc, leaning forwards slightly, eyes wide.

"I kissed her."

It only took Havoc half a second to process this and slap him upside the head, "Are you telling us you took advantage of Lieutenant Hawkeye when she was drunk?!" he said loudly- furious that anyone could even think of hurting his 'little sister'.

"No!" Roy exclaimed, his hand flying up to rub the back of his head. "I would never do that!!"

Havoc's eyes were still narrowed sceptically.

"What happened then?" asked Breda.

"Nothing," Roy swore. "…Well, okay- not _much_. We were both shirtless in her room, but I swear that I ended it there."

"YOU HAD HER TOPLESS?!?!" the four other men yelled. Havoc, furious; Falman, amazed; Fuery, shell-shocked; Breda, totally and utterly envious.

Roy nodded, staring down at his meal and trying desperately not to remember how absolutely perfect her body was. "But I ended it there," he repeated. I just saw her tucked into bed and went to sleep in the guest room."

"Hey, sir… What were you even doing there when Hawkeye was ill anyway?" asked Fuery.

"I went to see if she was okay," said Roy truthfully. "She said she was feeling better so we went out to get something to eat, and by the time we got back it was dark and raining like Hell, so she invited me inside."

"And in the morning?" asked Falman.

"She didn't remember anything… I thought it best not to remind her in the morning. Though I did kiss her just now in the office and I think she was kissing me back-"

"Girl Problems?" asked Lieutenant Brosh, raising his eyebrows a little as he sat down with Roy's group.

"Hawkeye Problems," Breda corrected him.

Brosh looked confused.

"There's a difference," said Havoc wisely. "Hawkeye Problems are much more dangerous."

"I see," Brosh mused. "Do tell."

"You expect me to take advice about girls from a man who's been trying to ask the same woman out for almost four years?"

"Technically," said Brosh. "I haven't actually _tried_ yet…"

"Ah, but you know who he's talking about, don't you?" asked Havoc, grinning.

"Weren't we talking about the Colonel's Hawkeye Problem?" Falman reminded them, and the small group looked thoughtful.

"Well one thing's clear," said Havoc eventually. "We can't let her return to the North."

"And how do you propose to bend her iron will?" asked Roy, leaning forwards onto he table, resting his weight on his elbows.

"We make it so she doesn't have a choice."

"You don't think any number of men could detain a sober and gun-wielding Lieutenant Hawkeye, do you?" asked Fuery, looking a little scared.

"I'm not talking about physically detaining her," said Havoc, leaning forwards. "But Hawkeye'd never disobey an order from a superior officer, would she?"

"You mean Mustang?" asked Brosh and the rest of the table –except for Roy- just laughed at him.

"Haha! H-Hawkeye d-doesn't take orders from M-Mustang!!" Breda spluttered eventually. "M-Mustang t-takes orders from Hawk-k-eye!!"

"He means Armstrong," said Roy, glaring at Havoc.

"Y-yeah," said Havoc, sobering a little. "But only as a last resort. You can go after her, and then we'll get Armstrong on the line as a back up."

"Do you think she'll stay?"

"…" Havoc wasn't quick to answer- he already knew that Riza held Roy's safety over the threat of a court martial, but he was optimistic. "With all the pressure the others'll be affording her, she just might."

-

"You're leaving again, aren't you?" said Maria, looking more than just a little pissed as Riza left headquarters and started off down the street.

"Yes," said Riza, not even stopping to speak to her friend.

Maria chased after her, grabbed her shoulder and pulled her back to face her, causing Riza to have to bite her lip to keep from crying out in pain. "How can you do that after all Mustang's been through?!"

An unreadable look passed over Riza's face, "of course," she said, her eyes narrowing a little. "I should be worrying about what _he's_ been through, never mind my own kidnap and rape- never mind that."

"Riza, don't be so tetchy- I didn't mean it like that!"

"I'm not," said Riza, jerking away and walking ahead. "Mustang was foolish. He could have died because of me- without even checking up on the facts. I have every right to be angry."

"Listen, it was Denny who was eavesdropping, not me, so don't get pissed when I tell you I heard about it," said Maria, linking arms with her firmly. "But when Mustang fought that one homunculus, Lust-"

"Don't even bring that up with me," said Riza, reaching for her gun with her free hand but knowing that it wouldn't even phase her close friend.

"-You thought he was dead, and didn't you give up the will to live too?"

"It's not the same thing, Maria," Riza hissed, halting to glare at her feet.

"You're right," said Maria, "it's _not_ the same. Mustang may have risked his life and more to bring you back, but from the sound of things you practically encouraged that homunculus to kill you! He actually tried to fix something! He didn't turn _suicidal_, Riza!!"

"I didn't either," said Riza, looking up and eyes flashing angrily.

"'Run! You still have a reason to live!'- You collapsed and yelled that to Alphonse Elric. Don't bother denying it; the boy told me so himself." Maria said, equally angry. "If you don't call that statement suicidal, what _would_ you?"

"It's not something I'm proud of, Maria- just leave off it."

"Why are you so determined to believe that Mustang can't possibly care as much about you as you care about him-?!"

"Just shut up!!" Riza cried, and Maria stepped back in surprise- seeming to realise that she'd finally pushed her too far. "I _know_ that he's in love with me- I don't _need_ to hear you say it, okay? This isn't some stupid inferiority complex! I just-!" Riza paused here a moment, to compose herself. "…I just can't let him get hurt again because of me."

"…Riza-"

"That's why I have to leave, Maria."

"But think of all you're leaving behind here, Riza," Maria pleaded and Riza flashed her the most determined and stubborn look she could possibly muster at a stage so close to tears as she was.

"If I stayed here, I'd lose it anyway." She started walking a little faster ahead of her, saying to the long stretch of empty road before her, '"I'm going to visit the Hugheses before I leave. You can come, but I'd rather you didn't tell either or them that I'm leaving. It will be easier for all of us that way."

"…Yes, Riza."

-

**DFR: More on Corliss, and possibly Dante next chapter. Until next time, adieu. -Rissy**


	14. Chapter 13

**DFR: Okay, I was planning to be a liiiiittle meaner to Corliss this chapter but I figured I'd give the poor girl –uhmm… homunculus- a break for a change -Rissy**

**Chapter 13**

"Aunty Riza!!"

Riza bent down to embrace the five-year-old who opened the door for a moment, before looking up at her mother and smiling.

"Riza; Maria. Come in!" Gracia said, beaming.

Five minutes took them into the living room, chatting easily with Elysia playing around in a corner. Suddenly, though, a dark shadow passed over Gracia's face, "have you met this Hawkeye woman yet? I haven't myself, but Ms Rockbell and Elysia apparently ran into her at the park with Mr Mustang."

"Yes, I've seen her," said Riza, while Maria watched her intently.

"Is it true then? Is she really your cousin?"

"We're not _blood _cousins…"

"Riza?" Gracia seemed concerned.

Knowing that she'd have to tell her in the end, Riza lowered her voice further, "That woman is the homunculus Roy- Colonel Mustang created in my image."

"And Mr Mustang's hanging around with her?" asked Gracia, eyes widening significantly. "Those homunculi- those homunculi-" her voice shook, but she forced herself to go on, also low enough so that Elysia couldn't hear it. "Those homunculi were the ones who killed Maes!"

Riza nodded guiltily. "She claims to be on our side, though- or Colonel Mustang's, at least- and he's watching her carefully. He'll be fine."

"And you?"

Riza and Maria exchanged glances, then, and Riza shook her head, knowing that Gracia had picked up on her leaving herself out of the argument of Roy's relative safety. Gracia's face fell further at the look, understanding miserably, "Riza, you can't leave again."

"I have to, Gracia. All this mess is because of me. He could have been killed and it was my fault."

"Riza, don't you think for a second that what those men did to you was your fault," said Gracia, clenching her fists in her lap. "Don't you _ever_ think that!"

Maria agreed fervently but Riza shook her head. "You don't understand."

"Then fill us in!" said Maria hotly, "because I have absolutely no idea how _any of this_ is your fault, Riza!"

"He was with me the night before it happened," she said, staring down at her lap so she wouldn't have to face the looks she knew her friends would be affording her. "Nothing really happened- at least not in the way that you're thinking… We were both intoxicated, more I than him, though. He kissed me and I let him."

"You-?" Maria began, but Riza didn't let her finish.

"He removed my shirt and my guns but wouldn't let me take it any further while I was under the influence of alcohol…" She smiled fondly at the memory. "I didn't remember a lot at first in the morning. I was confused because he'd woken me up and it was already getting into the late morning. I did notice that my guns- even the holster from my thigh- were gone but I was too distressed, trying to remember what had happened, to put them back… by the time I left for work I was still distracted and unarmed. And I'd told him not to wait for me… if he'd been there I'm sure it never would have happened… I was foolish. But he shouldn't have tried that- I can't believe that he'd- He just shouldn't have tried to bring me back… It wasn't right. Did he honestly think I'd think him for it? For bringing me back to live with the shame and my wounds and the fact that he lost his arm- could have lost his life- for me?"

"Aren't you glad you survived, Riza?" asked Gracia softly.

"Of course I am. I'm not suicidal," said Riza, eyebrows furrowing a little. "But if he'd actually managed to bring me back he would have lost more- equivalent exchange and all that… If he'd brought me back and managed to kill himself, or even just maim himself more heavily, in the process… Then no. I'd rather he didn't. I'd just never be able to live with myself- you have no idea how hard I'm finding it as it is."

"And you think running away- making his sacrifice come to nothing- is going to make you feel better?" asked Gracia.

"It's going to keep him safe."

"What? Leaving him under the protection of the homunculus?" she asked sceptically.

"Don't try to change my mind, Gracia. I'm afraid and confused as it is, don't you understand?"

Gracia shook her head, "no. I don't understand at all. Whether or not you leave, Mustang is _going_ to search for the men who hurt you. He loves you far too much to get away with it. What would you do if they harmed him? If they killed him? All because you couldn't be there to protect him _like you promised._"

"I'm scared," said Riza softly.

"Then let him protect you- God knows he's trying."

Riza shook her head and climbed to her feet with a small whimper, "Please don't make me say it again, Gracia. I just can't stay here." She turned and left, Maria following miserably.

Elysia jumped to her feet with a cry of "Aunty Riza, don't go!!"

But she didn't even look back.

-

"Hawkeye, do you know where I can find Riza?" asked Roy as he walked back into his office.

"She wouldn't want me to tell you," said Corliss, not looking up from her work.

"Hawkeye, please. I can't let her leave again!"

Corliss just shook her head.

"I need her, Hawkeye! Why won't you help me?!"

"…You don't need her, sir. You've got me."

Roy had to restrain himself from yelling at her- telling her that it wasn't the same. He knew it wouldn't be good to upset her- who knew what kind of monstrous and unexplainable alchemy she could pull on him? "Corliss…" he walked over to stand before her, crouching down to her level before continuing gently. "I do need her and I love her very much, but that doesn't mean I'm going to forget about you. Just think how Riza must feel- she doesn't want you to take her place either."

"You're wrong, sir," said Corliss. "That's exactly what she wants. She wants you to forget about her so that you can be safe. She wants to disappear and never see you again."

"Please, Corliss. I can't stand hurting her like this," said Roy sincerely and she caved with a depressive sigh.

"She- She's staying in Maria Ross' apartment on Fifth Street for the night. Tomorrow morning she's returning to the North by train."

Roy kissed her cheek quickly and fled the room in a heartbeat, while Corliss stared at the empty doorway miserably.

"He doesn't want me…" she whispered to herself. "He's using me to get to Riza. Even if I were human… he'd still want her. I'm special to Dante. She _needs me_- like Roy used to need me until Riza came back. I can be special that way, and if Roy can't see it, then it's his loss."

She stood up suddenly, scraping her chair back, and made for the door, where she bumped into a slightly familiar looking chest.

"Mr Havoc?"

Havoc looked down at her in surprise, "Corliss? Is something wrong?" Corliss nodded miserably and suddenly Havoc understood.

"Has Roy gone after Riza?"

Corliss nodded again and Havoc put his arms around her, mentally preparing himself to be slapped. He wasn't. Looking down at her cautiously, he saw that her eyes were closed and she was smiling.

"Do you like me, Mr Havoc?"

"Sure I do," said Havoc, tugging on her ponytail lightly with a grin.

"More than any other girl?"

Havoc thought back to his black list of females, then to his beloved, but painfully ignorant, best friend, Sheska. "Uhm…?"

"Please, Mr Havoc? You like me, don't you?"

Seeing the desperation of her face, he stroked her hair gently, "you and Riza are both like little sisters to me, Corliss, but I've got someone else I like a lot right now, even if she doesn't like me back…"

Corliss tore out of his arms and looked down at the ground disdainfully.

"But I won't ever leave you, Corliss," he promised, reaching out to touch her arm gently. "And neither will Roy. You're one of us now- everyone thinks so."

"But you don't like me best…"

"Be patient, Corliss. Some day you'll find someone who does- just like Riza and Roy found each other. It might be me; it might be someone else. Just give it time, and try not to be jealous of Riza. She and Roy went through their fair share of heartbreak up until now and it's still going on..." Havoc laughed grimly, "in fact, you're probably the luckiest out of all of us. You haven't got anyone to hurt you like we do, but you're still not alone."

"I like you, Mr Havoc," said Corliss, latching onto his arm with a naïve smile and a giggle.

Havoc grinned, "I like you too, Little Sis."


	15. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

"Good evening, Second Lieutenant Ross."

"Mr Mustang! What brings you here?" asked Maria, blushing as she stood before her commanding officer in her pyjamas.

Sensing her discomfort, Roy apologised sincerely. "I'm very sorry for coming so late and without warning, but I was told that Riza was staying here and… well, it took a while for me to actually the place without her…"

Maria made no move to step out of the doorway and let him in- even at the risk of the entire world seeing her blue puppy pyjamas. "I'm sorry, sir. She's not here."

'Please, Second Lieutenant Ross," said Roy. "Will you let me speak to her?"

"Didn't you hear me, sir?" Maria's voice was tense. "_I said: She's not here._"

"Ross-"

"Sir, it's late. I'd like to get some sleep if you don't mind-"

"I can't leave without speaking to her. I'm sorry."

Maria opened her mouth to complain but she was stopped by a hand coming to rest on her shoulder from behind. "Ri-?"

"It's okay, Maria," she said softly. "This'll only take a minute."

"Riza, I-!"

Riza halted his rushed attempt to get a word in by shaking her head firmly. "Come in. We'll talk about this inside."

If Roy noticed how much more tired she was looking since he saw her last he didn't comment on it- merely followed her past Maria and inside hastily, just in case she changed her mind.

Riza led him into the living room of Maria's small apartment and they sat down, Maria excusing herself awkwardly a moment later. Sitting across from her on one of a set of two steel blue sofas, Roy suddenly had nothing to say. He opened his mouth to speak but no words came out. Riza just nodded understandingly.

"I know you came to ask me to return to work with you… But you must know that I can't, right? I've said it plainly enough."

Roy shook his head, wringing his hands hopelessly and wanting nothing more than to just hold her close to him again. "Riza, I can't stand what happened to you. I'm not going to let you out of my sight and have it happen again."

"I'll be careful, sir."

"Can't you see that everyone wants you to stay here, Riza? We're your friends!"

Riza looked down, "…You want to be more than that though, don't you?" There was a slight edge to her voice and Roy was shocked to find that she sounded almost afraid.

"Not if it would make you uncomfortable, Riza," he was quick to reply. "I just need you around. It can go back to the way it's always been, can't it? Watching each other's backs?"

"I…" Riza leaned over the coffee table and kissed his cheek chastely. "Thank you, Roy. Just… thank you."

"You'll stay?"

Riza nodded slowly, "only if you promise me you'll never do something so foolish ever again- No more human transmutations. No more putting yourself in danger because of me."

"But, Riza-"

Riza's eyes hardened stubbornly. "No, sir. It is my job to protect you and I won't let you injure yourself any further for my sake."

Roy just stood up silently and went to sit beside her, pulling her into his lap affectionately and holding her close. Riza tensed slightly but soon relaxed enough to turn her head into his chest and bury her face in his shirt.

"I'm so glad you're back, Riza."

"Me- Me too, sir."

Riza closed her eyes and breathed in deeply, drifting off to sleep just as Maria returned with three cups of tea. She didn't look put out, though. In fact, she was smiling sadly.

"Thank you, sir. I've been trying to get her to sleep all night but she keeps having these horrible nightmares…" Roy held her closer protectively and Maria smiled wider. "I'll get some blankets out for the couch if you'd like to stay with her."

Roy considered this but shook his head, "she wouldn't want me to," he said, stroking her hair fondly. "You'll drive her to work tomorrow, won't you?"

"She's staying?"

"Yes, she is."

Maria beamed, then she deflated a little, "But what about the other Miss Hawkeye. What will you tell her?"

"I'll have her transferred," said Roy easily but Maria shook her head, eyebrows furrowing slightly.

"That girl depends on you- you can't just throw her away."

"So I'll have an extra head to help with the workload," said Roy, shrugging, and Maria's frown deepened.

"I really hope it turns out that simply, Colonel Mustang. I really hope so."

"What do you mean?" asked Roy and Riza squirmed slightly as he stopped stroking her hair, a soft mewling sound coming from her sleeping body. Roy looked down in surprise but resumed his actions before glancing back up at Maria, only to find that she had left. Despite his earlier resolve, he decided to stay and he whispered sweet things to her before he, too, fell asleep.

-

Riza opened her eyes slowly and was immediately aware of another body lying next to hers. A small cry escaped her lips and the body received a sharp knee to the groin before she rolled off the couch, bumped her head on the coffee table and looked up to see just who it was that she had assaulted.

The boy sat up with a groan and looked down at her on the floor.

"Sir!"

Roy blinked before grinning and chuckling ruefully. "Oh, right. I'm sorry. I did mean to leave but I guess I fell asleep."

Riza's harried breathing calmed a little. "No, I'm sorry," she said. "Did I hurt you at all?"

"I'm fine. Are you okay? Second Lieutenant Ross said that you'd been having trouble sleeping before I came."

"I'm alright," said Riza, smiling, albeit a little shakily. "What time is it?"

"I'm not sure," said Roy, just as Maria walked through the door and announced that she had breakfast ready for them in the kitchen.

-

Breakfast was a relatively quite affair held in the tiny kitchen of Maria's one-person apartment. Still, the modest meal of dry cereal and leftover spaghetti sandwiches was eagerly accepted by the oddly ravenous pair and the meal passed in good humour.

-

That morning Roy walked into work with a smile on his face for the first time in several months, tailed once again by his faithful First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye, who was quite heavily battered but also smiling softly.

One of the first people to notice was Sheska, who was walking down the hall in the opposite direction with Havoc and Corliss on either side of her.

"Riza!"

Havoc and Corliss looked up simultaneously.

"Hawkeye!"

Corliss was silent.

"Good to see you all again," said Riza in a voice that came pretty close to her usual monotone. "Please forgive me for making you all worry."

Havoc and Sheska saluted, both grinning widely and Corliss smiled hollowly.

"An addition to the team, not a replacement," said Roy firmly and Corliss' smile turned real.

"Welcome back, Miss Hawkeye!"

Riza smiled too, "Thank you, cousin."


	16. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Things did not get much easier for Roy Mustang during the following weeks- not because their was any remaining animosity between the two 'cousins' but because he now had two armed Hawkeyes in his little office and there was absolutely zero chance of slacking off.

"Hey, Lieutenant Hawkeye," said Corliss, standing up as Riza walked back into the room with a cup of tea and an armful of paperwork. "Will you watch the Colonel while I get lunch from the mess hall?"

Riza smiled and nodded, "go ahead," she said, flashing an amused glance at Roy, who was pouting.

Corliss left and Roy let out a long drawn out sigh.

"Oh, stop being a baby, sir," said Riza. "You can have your lunch when you're finished your paperwork. I haven't eaten yet either- in case you hadn't noticed."

"Yes, Lieutenant, but you're more machine than flesh! You don't _need_ to eat!"

"Coming from the man with the synthetic arm,' said Riza, rolling her eyes as she looked back down at her work.

Roy just sighed again, but he was secretly glad because he'd seen that Riza really was fleshing out again after returning to him so thin and frail before. With that thought he was almost actually content to return to his paperwork.

-

It was Roy's only condition to Riza's wish to return to life in her own apartment that she came in for weekly check ups at the military infirmary per her doctor's request. She had not been required by the agreement to tell Doctor Mary Stone how she had come into such a battered state, but it was very likely that she had already guessed. What Riza wasn't counting on was a phone call from the Intensive Care ward she had originally been admitted to. Except that it didn't come to her- it came to the private home line of Roy Mustang.

"Hello?"

"_This is Doctor Mark Hudson from the Royal Central Hospital. Is Elizabeth home?"_

"Excuse me?" said Roy.

"_Elizabeth Mustang," _said Doctor Hudson. _"She was here a couple of months ago. This is the number she gave-"_

Roy's eyebrows furrowed slightly. "Is something wrong with her?"

"_It's odd, really. She disappear and then someone managed to hack into the records system- we're still trying to recover some corrupted files but we don't believe that Ms Mustang was ever officially discharged. Also, that she left the hospital before we could give her the results of some important and confidential tests. Is she home?"_

"Uhh… Not right now. She should be back soon though- would you please call back in half an hour or so?"

"_Of course. Goodbye, Mr…?"_

"Mustang," Roy supplied.

"_Oh, you're her husband? My deepest condolences for what happened to your wife, truly."_

Roy didn't correct him. "Thank you. I'll talk to you soon." He hung up, a feeling of dread creeping over him. They'd been talking about Riza, hadn't they? What could be wrong with her now?

-

30 minutes found Riza sitting worriedly by the phone in Roy's apartment, waiting for the hospital to call back. He hadn't asked why she had given her name as Elizabeth Mustang- hadn't even brought it up. She was glad. It wasn't something she wanted to try to explain.

The phone rang and Riza was on it before Roy could even look up from where he sat beside her on the couch (which he had moved back since emptying the room for his transmutation, of course).

"Hello? Yes, this is Elizabeth. I see. Oh my goodness… Of course. I'll come right away." The conversation was over in a heartbeat (well, several very fast ones in Roy's case) and Riza hung up. Her face was pale and her eyes were wide. Her voice had seemed so strong and level a moment ago but now she was close to tears.

Roy stood up and put his arms around her waist, kissing her cheek gently before whispering in her ear, "what did she say, Riza?"

Riza just shook her head, "Roy, I need to go back to the hospital. Will you come with me? Please?"

"Of course," said Roy instantly. "I refuse to be left behind- come on."

"Thank you… Roy…"

Roy hugged her tighter and kissed her cheek again before releasing her. "We'd better go now."

"Yes, thank you again…"

"No problem," said Roy firmly and they left.

-

"Mr Mustang, please wait outside while we talk to your wife."

Roy glanced at the door to the pristine and immaculate office the doctor was gesturing towards and then back at Riza, who didn't look like she particularly wanted to be left alone.

"Elizabeth, would you rather I came in with you?" asked Roy, placing a hand on her arm.

"No," the doctor answered for her. "It would probably be better if she came alone."

Roy ignored him and kept his eyes on Riza who was looking unsure. "Elizabeth?"

Riza shifted uncomfortably. "You must understand, Doctor, that I've had a rough time of things recently and I would feel much better if he were with me. After all, what could you possibly have to say to me that my husband-" she glanced at Roy apologetically "-shouldn't be allowed to hear?"

"It is in your best interest, Ms Mustang," said the doctor but he gave no reason.

Riza nodded slowly, "all right then," she said. "If you think so."

Roy placed a hand on her cheek and kissed her on the nose and then the cheek. "I'll be waiting down the hall, okay?" he said, running the pad of his thumb over her cheek gently.

"If you will, Ms Mustang," said the Doctor, holding the white door slightly ajar for her.

Riza nodded and kissed Roy full on the mouth quickly before drawing away and disappearing into the office.

The doctor followed her in and the door closed. Riza stiffened a little at the sound of the lock clicking but tried to ignore it. She knew it was probably no big deal but she was suddenly wishing that Roy hadn't left…

"Will this take long?" she asked, resting a hand on her hip holster in a way that made her appear agitated but made her feel much calmer, knowing that her gun was loaded and ready for use at any time.

"You should have tried to run away from me, Miss First Lieutenant."

The voice was definitely coming from the Dr Hudson but it sounded oddly feminine… and oddly familiar. Riza's grip automatically tightened on her gun and she removed it from her holster.

"…Arissa?"

"You could say that," said the doctor, morphing into the familiar young woman. "…But I mostly get called _Envy_."

-

"Envy?" Corliss called to the surprisingly empty park. "Envy are you here yet? I have to talk to you about the plan."

There was no reply.

"I want to call it off. Are you here? Are you listening? Envy?"

Corliss' eyes widened slightly as she gathered that he actually _wasn't_ there and she immediately set off towards Riza's apartment and peered through the window. The lights were off and the windows were locked. Any other person might be sleeping… But the shutters were open and First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye did her shutters at precisely 5:32 PM in the winter. She wasn't home and it was getting late.

"Oh God, Envy- you haven't!" Corliss whispered to herself in horror, and with that she bolted at a run towards the Royal Central Hospital where, at that moment, Colonel Roy Mustang was looking up from a health magazine he'd been staring blankly at in the pristine waiting room for the past half hour- jolted back into reality by an exceptionally chilling sound:

The vaguely familiar clang of Riza Hawkeye's FN 1910 hitting the ground and the dull thud of a body that followed.

_A body. But whose?_

-

**An// Please don't kill me Erinn-chan!! (Ducks for cover)**


	17. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

Riza let out a sharp cry as her damaged and brutalized body was slammed back against the chest of drawers behind her. She crumpled to the ground and whimpered miserably as Envy stepped on, and effectively crushed, the hand she'd reached out to grab her fallen gun.

"Riza!!"

Riza threw a desperate glance at the locked door, "Roy Mustang, get out of here this instant!"

"Riza, what's happening in there?!"

Riza flung the gun from her crushed right hand to her left and shot desperately at her invincible assailant, who only fell back a few steps. "Sir," she called as she scrambled to her feet, "I only returned on the condition that you would not put yourself in any more danger for my sake. I must insist that you leave now!"

"Are _you_ giving _me_ an order Lieutenant?" Roy asked rhetorically and a moment later, the door had fallen by Riza's side- the hinges melted into a vile bronze sort of goo.

"_Sir!"_

"Stop complaining, Riza. No way will I let this bastard homunculus hurt you again!"

"Envy! Quittit!!"

Riza glanced towards Corliss in the empty doorframe worriedly but Roy kept his eyes fixed on Envy.

"What are you taking about? It was _your_ plan, Desire!" he was saying, just as alarms started to go off in the building.

"Corliss?" said Riza, rounding completely on her 'cousin'.

"Riza, I'm so sorry!" she whimpered in a helpless way that reminded Riza of 'Arissa' and disgusted her.

"Humans are so easy to manipulate," said Envy, grinning as he casually wiped a trickle of blood from his chin. "And congratulations, Desire- you're just like one of them."

Corliss didn't seem happy about hearing this statement from Envy. In fact, she looked furious. "If you dare hurt either Roy or my cousin I swear I'll-!"

"Your _cousin_, Desire?" Envy sneered.

"Yes!" said Corliss, sticking her chin out a bit. "_My cousin._"

"Desire, you don't even have _parents_, let alone a _cousin_."

"So?!" said Desire, glancing over at Riza, who was being mostly supported by Roy a few feet away. "She called me her cousin, and I have Roy too! And Havoc-oniisama!"

Riza suddenly felt an unexplainable wave of gratitude for Havoc.

"You think it's the same as having a family, Desire?"

Corliss puffed her chest out indignantly, "It's more of a family than _you've_ got, Envy! All you've got is Dante who doesn't care a wit about you, or anyone but herself!"

"Take that back, bitch! I'm going to be human a million years before you so just _shut up_!" Envy yelled, throwing violent and clumsy punches in every direction, seemingly intent on breaking everything there was to break in the small office.

"What the hell do you want with my Lieutenant, Homunculus," Roy growled protectively as he shielded her from a framed diploma that had come hurtling through the air towards them both.

Things stopped flying and Envy grinned maliciously, "it's not me that wants her- I'm just fulfilling orders. Now, if you'll just hand the bitch over, I'll be on my way."

"Fuck you," Roy muttered. Then, "Corliss, can I trust you to take Riza and get out of here?"

"What about you?!" Corliss and Riza replied together in equal horror.

"You don't think I can take care of myself?"

"No!" Also in unison.

Roy rolled his eyes, his hands on Riza's shoulders and his body shielding hers from anything Envy might care to chuck their way. "Look, if it makes you feel better, I'll follow straight after. Now hurry up and go, _Mrs Mustang_."

Riza blushed and turned to Corliss, who nodded and tugged her towards the window as Envy rushed at the door. Eyes widening, Riza cried out, "are you insane?! You can't jump out of a window this high!!"

Corliss didn't seem to hear because a moment later they were crashing through the glass and falling. Jolted suddenly, Riza squeezed her eyes shut and prepared for impact… but it never came.

-

Riza stared across the coffee table in her apartment at her homunculus. Aside from the great black wings and the midnight hair they could have been twins, and without them both there was very little distinction at all.

"…Thank you for helping me, Corliss," she said after a very long silence.

"Aren't you mad?" her double blurted out. "I was conspiring with Envy!"

"But when you came down to it, you knew who your friends really were. I know it's been hard for you and I respect that- the end result is all that matters…" Riza trailed off and caught Corliss' eye. "I know, and you know, that Roy wouldn't want us to go back there to help him, but if the end result is his survival and this is the only way, shouldn't you let me go?"

Corliss raised an eyebrow, "who said that I was stopping you?" she said. "I just realised that you were no longer adequately armed. Besides, you looked like you could use some recovery time."

Riza smiled gratefully. Then the phone rang. Riza frowned before going to answer it and found a rather distressed Havoc on the other end of the line.

"Homunculus at the Royal Central Hospital- you up for coming?"

"Don't worry," Riza was quick to assure him. "Corliss and I are on our way."

-

It was getting quite late when they arrived back at the hospital- _too_ late to do anything. Envy had already disappeared. After all, his target wasn't the colonel- it was his lieutenant.

Not to say that he didn't have a great deal of fun beating him up.

"Oh, for goodness sake, Mustang! This is what happens when I'm not here to protect you!" Riza fussed, helping him off the ground with a heavy sigh.

"Which is exactly why you're staying isn't it?" he said, coughing a little as he brushed her aside.

Riza screwed up her face a bit and put her hands on her hips, but nodded. "Yes, I am. You already knew that I was. Now come on, let's get you cleaned up."

"Sorry, Lieutenant," said Havoc from the door. "There isn't a single doctor left in the building- nor a single patient for that matter. They all evacuated during the fight."

Riza sighed again, "I guess I'll have to do it. Can you give me a hand with him, Corliss?"

"I don't need help," Roy whinged as he found himself supported by the two young women.

"Let him go home with Hawkeye," said Havoc, looking at Corliss. "You can come with Fuery and I, right? He'll be joining us in a minute but we'll need a few extra hands getting things running again at this end."

"What if Envy goes after them?" Corliss worried.

"I doubt he will- not tonight," said Havoc. "We'll sort out what to do in the morning. Hawkeye, just in case, maybe the Colonel should stay with you overnight."

Riza just nodded silently. "If he has no objections," she said.

He hadn't, and they left.

Havoc turned to Corliss again once they were gone, "Sheska and I are having dinner tonight and Fuery was wondering if you'd like to go with him? Sort of like a double-date?"

"He's the cute one with the puppies, right, oniisama?"

"That's right," said Havoc, grinning.

"But aren't we supposed to be cleaning up this mess now?"

"Too much for one night," Havoc replied easily. "So what do you say? Dinner's on him!"

"Uhm… Havoc, I don't _eat_."

"That's perfect- the little guy hasn't got a lot of cash on him since he lost our bet anyway," said Havoc brightly. "So d'you want to come along?"

Corliss frowned, but a few moments later she was smiling again. "Okay!" she said excitedly. "You can tell Mr Fuery that I'd love to go out with him!"

Havoc grinned widely, "He'll be stoked."

-

_**AN/ **_**After not updating in so long I felt like I had to do something nice for everyone D So Havoc's going out with Sheska, Corliss is going out with Fuery and Roy and Riza are spending the night together at her apartment! Lol, don't worry- PG 13, I swear! Lucky for you guys, I'm sick and haven't got anything better to do than this!! Actually, though, I feel fine but mum's making me stay home anyway since I was vomiting last night. Honestly, I think it was just all the Krispy Kremes and the homemade cake they gave us at our House Meetings- our house came last again so they decided to cheer us up with food. It worked. See y'all later! –Rissy chan**


	18. Chapter 17

**AN// I just saw this really depressing play with my parents so I didn't feel like being all that angsty with this chapter- way depressed enough. It was really good though- just uber sad. Me and mum were bawling our eyes out and I have a secret suspicion that dad was too, lol :3 Anyway, enjoy this chapter! Oh! And it's 1:20am and officially my birthday so you're not allowed to flame today, alright? Lol, cyaz!! -Rissy**

**Chapter 17**

"What's the point of my staying here if you won't let me help you," Riza griped as she ran a damp towel over one of a few deep gauges on Roy's one flesh arm. At this point, though, she wasn't threatening to leave- just letting off some steam. She didn't know if she had the will power to leave again anyway.

"Sorry, Riza," Roy sighed obligingly. "I'll let you help out next time."

"Damn right you will," snapped Riza, plonking the towel down on the table irritably as she reached for the bandages. Once she was done fixing him up and had lectured him to a degree she deemed sufficient, however, she became much more agreeable, apologising for the severity of her critique and going to get them both hot drinks from the kitchen.

"You can sleep in the guest room again tonight," said Riza. "You know where it is. Are you hungry at all? Goodness, I wonder if I even have anything in the fridge. It's been so long-"

"I'll find us something to eat," said Roy, standing up and turning towards the kitchen. "Hayate needs feeding too, right?"

Riza blinked and nodded, surprised by how responsible he was being. "Yes, that's right," she said, following him into the kitchen slowly. "But you really don't have to help- I'm sure you're tired enough as it is."

"I'm fine," Roy promised but Riza hovered over his shoulder worriedly all the same.

When Hayate was fed and a meagre dinner had been scraped together onto the table, the atmosphere softened a little and Riza allowed herself to fall back into peaceful conversation with him. Soon, though, it became apparent that Roy was getting tired, and Riza wasn't far behind either.

"We should go to bed soon," said Riza as she brought her plate back into the kitchen, closely followed by Roy doing the same. "It's getting late and we've both got work tomorrow."

Roy nodded vaguely and went to lie down along the length of the couch.

"I have a guest room, if you'd like- remember?" said Riza, standing over him with a look of concern on her face, but Roy just shook his head and pulled her down next to him gently, her chest pressed against his and their faces suddenly very close.

"Roy…?"

"I love the feeling of you in my arms," he said softly, and she could see the sincerity and innocence in his dark eyes as well as feel it emanating from his warm body against hers.

"There's not nearly enough space for both of us to sleep comfortably on the couch," she told him softly, standing up and shaking her head. "But if you really want to join me in my bed, you may."

Roy sat up immediately, nodding.

"Though that is definitely not an invitation to start anything inappropriate with me, alright?" she warned hastily as he took her hand and lead her towards her room. "Especially as I have 17 handguns still hidden in my room and 42-"

"Relax, Riza- I won't try anything," Roy promised and she nodded, smiling just a little nervously.

"Okay, thank you." She opened the door and turned around to strip off the outermost layer of her clothing, Roy doing the same, and she climbed into bed slowly, shifting to allow him to hold her as he appeared at her side.

"I'm sorry that you were so badly hurt because of me," he said softly as he stared at all of the bruises and scars that were now uncovered.

"It wasn't your fault… And it's better than before- It's just that I'm still recovering…" Riza replied, blushing lightly. "I'm sorry…" She rolled out of bed and moved towards her closet hastily, leaving Roy still in bed and looking confused.

"What are you doing, Riza?" he asked, sitting up and frowning.

"…Trying to find a nightdress that I can change into that will cover more," she replied without turning around.

"You don't need to worry about it," said Roy, coming over to embrace her from behind gently, hearing the sad note her voice had taken on. "You will always look beautiful to me, no matter what- okay?"

Riza was silent for a while but as she turned around in his arms he was able to see that she was crying.

"And you know that I'm not just saying that, right?" he added sincerely and she nodded, pressing her face into his chest tearfully.

Eventually, she managed to pull away a little. "I was so scared when it happened, Roy," she whispered, staring up into his big black eyes naively. He didn't have to ask what she was talking about. "I was always wanting so badly for you to be there. Especially after the first time… it hurt so badly that I cried, and I hated myself for showing weakness to Him." A tiny sob escaped her throat and he brought his arms around her. "After that night I promised myself that I'd never cry again, but I've already made a botch of it so many times."

"You had every right to cry," said Roy softly, realising only then just how little he actually knew about what had happened to her.

Apparently thinking the same, Riza clutched him a little tighter and shook her head. "I'm sorry. I'll talk to you about it someday, Roy, and I'll have to make a statement to the military about it at some point…" she said quietly. "But right now it's still too painful, okay?"

"Let's just go to bed now," Roy agreed. "You look like you could use some rest."

Riza sniffled one last time before closing her closet and smiling wryly- if a little shakily. "And I thought that _I_ was supposed to be taking care of _you_ tonight, Roy."

Roy just grinned and shook his head. "We'll take care of each other, okay?"

"Will you hold me while I sleep?" Riza asked suddenly, blushing deeply with a shy smile on her face.

Roy leaned down to kiss her cheek gently, his lips lingering for a moment on her flushed skin before he took her hand and pulled her back to bed with him. "Of course."

Riza curled into a ball and snuggled against his chest happily.

"I love you, Riza."

A small smile touched at the corners of her lips and she let out a tiny nervous giggle before replying "…You too. Night, Roy."

"Night night, baby."

A few moments passed in silence before Riza replied in her usual flippant tone, "…Usually I'd do something about you calling me 'baby', Roy, but count yourself lucky that I'm just too damn tired to reach for my gun right now."

"Aww, come on, Rize- it was an endearment!"

Riza just chuckled and tilted her head up to kiss his jaw lightly. "Fine… but at work tomorrow morning it's back to normal, okay?"

"…Yeah, I know. It's safer that way." Roy exhaled heavily and rolled onto one side to look at her properly, one hand resting by his head and the other stretching out to circle around her shoulders. "But I wish we didn't have to."

Riza just closed her eyes and shifted her position again slightly. "It's not just the military," she told him steadily. "I'm not ready for a physical relationship with anyone right now- Hell, I don't think I would have been ready even before this whole mess. You understand, don't you? At least if we're acting as superior and subordinate again we won't be risking the chance of losing ourselves to passion and doing something we'd later regret." Roy made to pull away from her in accordance with this statement, but she shook her head. "No, I don't mind. I think I need you here tonight."

"Are you sure?" asked Roy, sliding a hand up to stroke her jaw gently.

"Yes," said Riza, nuzzling his hand lovingly. "And, by the way… I never got the chance to thank you before it happened."

"Thanks me? For what?"

"For not going too far with me that night when we were drunk," said Riza, closing her eyes. "And I'm also very sorry for putting you in that position. Even then I knew that I loved you, and it frightened me- I don't know how I would have reacted if I awoke with you beside me back then. Anyway… I just wanted to say thank you."

"I would never use you that way, Riza," Roy swore and Riza nodded, eyes still closed.

"We really should go to sleep now, you know? I'm exhausted."

"Okay. But where would you like me to put my arms?" asked Roy considerately. "I won't touch you anywhere that you don't want me to."

Riza positioned them both so that they were very close but not touching anything inappropriate and rested her head under his chin, her mouth moving over the sensitive skin around his collarbone unconsciously. "Goodnight again, Roy. Hopefully the next time I speak to you it will be morning, and not because I've gotten myself distracted again."

Roy kissed the top of her head gently and nodded. "Night, Riza. Don't let the bed bugs bite."

"You bite?" said Riza snarkily, chuckling a little, before she could stop herself.

Roy just grinned and tickled her side lightly, before leaning over to whisper in her ear softly. "Good_night_, Riza."

"…Night, Roy," she replied, with a tiny grin.

_And after that, they both slept._


	19. Chapter 18

**Hi there!! It's been so long since I've updated so I decided to just put this chapter up as is! Enjoy! -Riss**

**Chapter 18**

Riza opened her eyes slowly and let out a contented sigh.

"Morning, sleepyhead," said Roy, grinning as he lay on his side, watching her.

She moaned softly in reply, stretching her legs out very slowly under the covers. "So comfortable… what time is it?"

"Almost ten," said Roy easily.

"_What?!"_

"I called the others to tell them that we wouldn't be in today while you were sleeping," said Roy and she frowned.

"Why'd you do that?"

"You needed rest. You know that's it's going to be a while before things go back to normal completely."

"This is more than just abnormal," Riza found herself muttering, but she didn't really care.

Roy just grinned. "Are you hungry? Or you can go back to sleep if you want."

"Mmmm…" Riza made that tiny moaning noise again and he took it to mean her consent to the latter as she closed her eyes and curled back up against him.

Oh well. It suited him fine too.

-

"Where're Hawkeye and the chief? Aren't they in yet?" asked Havoc, frowning as he walked into the office.

"Apparently they're both going be to out today," said Corliss, who had taken the call earlier.

"Really? D'you reckon something happened between them?" asked Breda, grinning widely.

Corliss shook her head. "She, at least, wouldn't."

"How much do you know about Hawkeye, anyway, Sis?" asked Havoc curiously as he sat down at his desk.

"Well, the colonel says that the other homunculi only get snatches of what happened to their predecessors and what kind of people they were -if that, at all. He said that that was because their souls were on the other side of the gate and so far away. But since Lieutenant Hawkeye's is so close to me, I understand more than the others do and I share more of her memories," said Corliss. "I know that she wouldn't do anything with the colonel because I can feel that she's still afraid. She trusts him more than anyone else in the world, but she was just hurt so badly…" she trailed off here and a pained expression passed over her face.

"Are you okay, Corliss?" asked Fuery kindly and she nodded, smiling at him all of a sudden.

"I'm fine, Sergeant!" she replied. "And so is Lieutenant Hawkeye, really! She's feeling much better every day and Colonel Mustang is helping her a lot!"

"Do you know what she's doing right now?" asked Breda, a perverted grin settling onto his face.

Corliss thought for a moment, then shook her head. "Nope. It's possible that she's still sleeping, but shouldn't the rest of us be working anyway?"

"Yeah! You know, we're lucky we have you to pick up the slack when Hawkeye's out," Fuery exclaimed brightly, while everyone else in the office was thinking the exact opposite. It was kind of cute, actually; he really was smitten with her. Then again, he had always had the teeniest tiniest crush on Riza too.

"I'm glad you think so!" said Corliss, beaming. "Now, back to work!"

The men glanced back towards their papers, deflating slowly and a collective sigh issued throughout the room before silence fell upon them once again.

-

By midday Riza was in still in bed with Roy and she had turned contemplative, staring at his left automail arm with a deep frown on her pretty face. She hadn't asked him whether or not it had hurt- she wouldn't have believed him if he said that it hadn't.

"It would have been better for us all if you hadn't done that, sir…" she sighed, slipping a slender leg over his side and cuddling closer to him.

"I don't think so," Roy disagreed. "I mean, at first I did… but then Corliss wouldn't be here, and, if nothing else, Fuery really does seem to like her."

"Yes, I suppose… But your arm-"

"-Has never been more efficient," Roy finished for her firmly. "You know, the other day, my hand got tired doing paperwork so I switched to the automail one and it worked just as well!"

Riza frowned deeply. "Roy, are you telling me that you'd give up an arm just for the chance to do your paperwork faster?"

"But now I'm ambidextrous!" he exclaimed happily.

Riza didn't reply.

"Look, I promise that I'm okay with this arm as long as you are," he went on, softer now, and he leaned forward to kiss her gently.

"…Okay." She moved out of his arms and stood up slowly.

"Where are you going?" asked Roy, sitting up and watching as she moved towards her wardrobe to pick out a civilian outfit for the day.

"It's already late… Besides, there's something that I need to do today."

"What is it?" asked Roy, pouting.

"Nothing," Riza assured him. "Just something I need to do. Don't wait up for me."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Roy asked her worriedly.

"I'll be fine by myself."

He didn't look happy about it, but he nodded. "…Just call if you need me, okay?"

"I will."

-

"Lieutenant Hawkeye!! Is something wrong?!"

Riza shook her head. "No, nothing's wrong exactly, Edward. There's just… something I need to speak to you about. Would you mind if we spoke in private?"

"Sure thing," said Ed, without hesitation, then he called across the hotel lobby to his little brother, speaking to the receptionist, that he'd see him later. "Let's go up to me and Al's room and you can tell me what's bothering you there."

"Okay… sure."

-

"Corliss-"

"Second Lieutenants- for the _last time_, I am _not_ spying on Mustang and Hawkeye for you!!"

"But why nooooot?!" Havoc whined. "I'm bored! I just wanna know what they're up to!"

"No!"

"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease!!"

"NO!"

"Are Colonel Mustang's injuries looking any better yet?" asked Fuery in his adorable little boyish voice.

"Hai. They're looking good," said Corliss, smiling at Fuery.

"And the Lieutenant?"

"She's gone to see Edward Elric at the hotel where he's staying"

"Oh, she's feeling better, then," said Fuery, smiling.

"Yeah, she is."

"Hey!! How come you're telling _Fuery_ but you didn't wanna tell _me_?!" Havoc cried out in anguish and Corliss glared at him.

"Because Fuery is actually _concerned_ about them, whereas you just want me to tell you how far they went when he was at her house last night!!"

"SO THEY DID DO SOMETHING!!" Breda and Havoc yelled.

"_**NO!!**"_

"Must you really aggravate her, you two?" sighed Fuery, shaking his head reproachfully.

"Hey!! How can you take her side?!" Havoc wailed.

"Because she's right!!" said Fuery and Corliss nodded determinedly.

"_See?!_ " she huffed. "Now back to work! And don't dare to make me take out my gun because I will _not hesitate_ to shoot each and every one of you mens' Little Happies off!!"

-

"Edward, I'm scared."

Ed's eyes widened slightly. "Huh? About the guys that that bastard Envy is supposed to be working for? The ones who hurt you?"

"No. Well, yes, I suppose… but no."

"What is it then?"

Riza bit her lip worriedly. "About the Colonel… I- I wanted to ask you some questions."

"Having problems with the automail already?" Edward sighed loudly. "Weakling!"

"No, there are no problems with it," said Riza, her voice growing quieter by the second. "It's just that… just that…" she took a deep breath. "Edward, I want to know whether or not he can feel me?"

"Feel you? How do you mean?" asked Edward.

"…When I touch his arm," said Riza and all of a sudden she seemed to be holding back tears. "Can he even feel me?" She reached out to touch Ed's arm timidly.

Nothing changed in his face and he shook his head. "Not touching like that," he told her cautiously. "He'll only be able to feel it if you jostle his shoulder where the joint is- that's the only place that there are still nerves… I'm sorry."

"It's okay, I understand," Riza sighed, climbing to her feet sadly. "It's not your fault… I was only curious." She turned around and made to leave but Ed's voice, from behind, held her back.

"…Lieutenant?"

"Yes, Edward?"

"You won't let a little thing like automail stand in the way of you and the Colonel, will you? I mean… if you really love each other and all, then it shouldn't matter."

"It doesn't matter," Riza agreed, shaking her head. "At least, not in the way that you mean, I promise you. And I… the Colonel does know that I love him no matter what-" she blushed as she said these words. "I only wanted to know… I'm sorry for bothering you."

"Not at all," said Ed, getting up to see her out as she headed for the door. "If you ever have any more questions, you can ask me, or whatever…"

He seemed a little embarrassed and Riza just smiled at his adorable discomfiture. "I will. Thank you, Edward."


End file.
